omg omg omg YOU GUYS beatmastrJ's house of Something Awful fame is ON ZILLOW including the fabled Dracula Fuck Bathroom -and- his built-in headboard that got the electrician goons to side-eye him wonder how many females are going to tour this masterpiece and despair aftermath.site/doom-bathroo... - ThreadSky

ceruleancynic.bsky.social • 5 days ago

omg omg omg YOU GUYS

beatmastrJ's house of Something Awful fame is ON ZILLOW including the fabled Dracula Fuck Bathroom -and- his built-in headboard that got the electrician goons to side-eye him

wonder how many females are going to tour this masterpiece and despair

https://aftermath.site/doom-bathroom-renovation-something-awful-for-sale

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devinsinger.bsky.social•5 days ago

Oh my god

ceruleancynic.bsky.social•5 days ago

you can definitely tell that beatmastrj wrote the listing description, it's that sweaty-palmed insistent "no u have to listen to my whole pickup artist line before saying no" vibe combined with breathlessly inaccurate real-estate jargon that characterized his posts

deeply satisfied :D

scottlynch78.bsky.social•5 days ago

Love a bathroom composed of nothing but sharp right angles so any slip means a minimum of three traumatic punctures

noelle.monster•5 days ago

And going through the floor. He cut through the joists to install the gravel basin for the bathtub.

ceruleancynic.bsky.social•5 days ago

don’t forget the mold farm in the fake plastic rocks surrounding the pointy death tub

scottlynch78.bsky.social•4 days ago

Absolutely says "you're gonna stop using this uncleanable ergonomic torture station faster than a family taking the pillows and spray-painted ostrich feathers off their walls a week after the last Trading Spaces camera crew leaves"

devinsinger.bsky.social•5 days ago

I'm struck by the the dramatically-curtained bed outline in one of the bedrooms. Like, the rest of the house is fine, not my thing but fine, but that one detail really hints at the coming Bathroom.

ceruleancynic.bsky.social•5 days ago

I have read through the listing description so you don't have to (you're welcome) and I gather that those curtains are for a Home Theater System:

"Also upstairs, the loft comes pre-wired for 7.1 surround sound and includes custom curtains to make you feel like you’re at the theater."

ceruleancynic.bsky.social•5 days ago

no, beatmastrJ, it makes you feel like you're in the house of a Something Awful goon who legit thought cutting the tops off engineered I-beams was a genius move

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