Like a big cloud of fog just dissipated over the map, and that’s a new territory I can explore happily and incorporate to my life map, making the world a little big bigger and less confusing.
The world strips away and I have something that is a joy to do. There’s no unnecessary distractions. The hard part is sharing that special interest with another person who shares in the interest.
Like I'm connected and sparking all over. When I'm not able to engage with special interests, I feel flat, like I'm just moving through life ticking boxes.
All sensory discomforts disappear. I take up a bigger space without being crowded or crowding anyone, pleasantly warmer, perfectly energetic. Leaving this mind state in and of itself feels gentle if I'm leading that transition but the old mind state returning feels kinda prickly and tight.
Comfort and solace mostly. I just wrote a whole essay about how music especially film music makes me calm in times of stress and upset and how it made me understand my autistic identity even more.
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