stede gets scammed at the docks for a treasure map would believe those fake amazon delivery texts and call them up like WHERE IS MY PARCEL???!!?! because he can't keep track of all the trinkets he buys
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ed is like babe you've never ordered from amazon in your life you're waiting on a 19th century vase from ebay and a 1960s pinafore from vinted. and stede is like YES AND WHERE ARE THEY EDWARD? MAYBE THIS FELLA KNOWS!!
au where ed is fucking with stede and pretending to be blackbeard the real pirate and eventually has to be like wait u know im kidding u right. right. sweetie pie
stede's like i'm not stupid ur not really blackbeard's ghost prove it and username blackbeard is like arrrr i will knock on your door 👻 (ed knocks on his door) (hears stede gasp real loud)
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