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adamgreat.bsky.social
Acutely anxious, chronically online. Trying to make my dog proud
335 posts 4,025 followers 456 following
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Posts 48 Comments 2

In space, nobody can hear your ass get clapped

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Just a boy and his favorite store

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

My dating profile

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

Snip snap snip snap HBO

submitted 11 days ago • 0 comments

My family crest is just a big pile of dirty laundry.

submitted 18 days ago • 8 comments

republican: *does something unconstitutional and evil* democrat: what the american people need now is a strongly worded letter

submitted 21 days ago • 1 comment

Swallowed a bug so I guess it's officially spring here now

submitted 23 days ago • 10 comments

ACAB includes hall monitors and line leaders

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

that one pretty girl in the friend group and her boyfriend

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

still hoping she’s our next pope

submitted 33 days ago • 0 comments

Maybe JD Vance should do a greet and meet with Donald Trump next

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

I just know the “Vatican Visit Small Group” Signal group chat is popping off right now

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

I can’t believe the Pope died after meeting JD Vance

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

The Easter Bunny after giving out eggs for free in this economy

submitted 35 days ago • 0 comments

friday night plans? you mean overthinking in bed??

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

wish the president cared about the first amendment as much as he cares about the second

submitted 37 days ago • 1 comment

if i send you this it means i’m down to talk shit about someone we don’t like

submitted 40 days ago • 0 comments

pov: you’re walking into the plans you forgot to cancel

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

For various reasons, many of which are unknown to even myself, I’ve decided to embark on a personal challenge to go for a run every day Because I have lost all traces of funny, I’m going to share this pathetic attempt here

submitted 53 days ago • 15 comments

adding “knows how to select the correct urinal” to the special skills section of my resume

submitted 42 days ago • 2 comments

they’re playing cupid shuffle at trader joe’s and i’ve never felt more white

submitted 44 days ago • 0 comments

Someone else be America's sweetheart today, I'm exhausted.

submitted 45 days ago • 4 comments

Pretty sure Thanos said this in Infinity War

submitted 45 days ago • 1 comment

pov: you have bad taste but you’re too chicken shit own it

submitted 45 days ago • 2 comments

Your 40s are for thinking that drinking more water will solve all your problems

submitted 49 days ago • 40 comments

LOTTA PPL HERE ARE POSTING USING ONLY LOWERCASE LETTERS SO IMMA SWITCH TO ALL CAPS ok that looks insane nvm 😳

submitted 50 days ago • 17 comments

If a TV show has a sidekick named Barney buckle up, cause you're in for a ride

submitted 48 days ago • 3 comments

The prospect of Soundgarden in the old folks' home is simultaneously unsettling and reassuring

submitted 51 days ago • 22 comments

Things I don’t want to know: 3. How much money I spend 2. My actual weight 1. How Crypto works

submitted 47 days ago • 19 comments

me when the server asks the group how we’re doing after waiting an hour for a table

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

Kiss the anglerfish on the doohickey until you force its hand and it swallows your head.

submitted 48 days ago • 2 comments

[world where biscuits are gravy and gravy are biscuits] I'd like some gravy and biscuits please

submitted 49 days ago • 11 comments

“the stock market is in retrograde” is a valid excuse to cancel plans

submitted 48 days ago • 1 comment

watching trump voters as the economy crashes like

submitted 48 days ago • 1 comment

1. Warn your buddies before destroying the markets. 2. They sell. 3. Destroy the markets. 4. Buddies buy back stock at incredible discounts. 5. Ultimately make meaningless tariff deals. 6. $$$$$$$$

submitted 48 days ago • 15 comments

i don’t understand the science behind it, but whenever my friend prefaces a story with “this is funny”, it never is. anyhoo, have i told y’all the one about my colonoscopy? no? this is funny…

submitted 48 days ago • 7 comments

Call me old fashioned but I'd never name my kid Big Balls.

submitted 49 days ago • 20 comments

If I could go back in time, I’d tell 20 year old me to pick one kind of Rubbermaid container and stick with it

submitted 49 days ago • 9 comments

men will poison their whole family instead of going to therapy

submitted 48 days ago • 0 comments

i’ve- i mean we’ve all been there

submitted 49 days ago • 1 comment

if i send you this it means i’m getting mine and leaving your ass behind

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

my mom finding “zac efron shirtless” in my google search history when i was a middle schooler

submitted 49 days ago • 1 comment

if this was your favorite section of a hardware store as a kid you’re gay now

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

always neat to see what happens to your classmates from grade school. for example, i turned out to be gay and other people voted for a fascist

submitted 50 days ago • 0 comments

If I had a nickel for every time a Republican president oversaw a market crash in my lifetime, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's more than what my retirement will be worth soon

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

wishing trump voters a very merry stock market crash

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

So what he really meant was “Make America the Great Depression Again”

submitted 52 days ago • 0 comments

them: you’re quiet, what’re you thinking about me:

submitted 53 days ago • 0 comments