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callmegerms.bsky.social
When I can find the time I write about music for fun and I used to funny online at one point https://theshuffle3.wordpress.com/
362 posts 76 followers 217 following
Prolific Poster

Milquetoast aesthetic

Sportswashing your Nan

Pubes d'jour

Shart in an Arby's

Super Mario Ska Album

Run Around and Scream

Y'all think those rage baiting bots ever get bored online?

Jamiroquai just showed up and danced around my grandma's casket.

Some old virgin is rolling over in his grave

Teckle my Schmeckle

Heavy Deuce was my nickname at sleep-away musical theatre improv camp.

Y'all think Freakazoid was at them freak-offs?

Y'all ever just make a joke online to mask a deep seeded hurt? Nah, me neither.

Me and my cousins used to play colonoscopy doctor when we were younger

Chintendo Vii

Murse Bussy

Penis Akimbo

Was my grandpa alcoholic hulk?

Episcopalian Water Park

Balls deep in the off-brand peanut butter

Torqued, jorked, and bespoke

A tub of goo named Lady Bisness

Dear diary, Caught the frank and beans in the zipper again. Regards.

I save my nip slips for special occasions.

Me and the thriving atheist internet community are doing a local theatre production of To Kill a Mockingbird this weekend.

Jorkin it 90s style

I think I didn't get the movie cus I never found out what the secret of the ooze was.

Tactical coochie

Your grandma's flaps gave me the meat sweats

Cavities, anal and otherwise

That's not very Save Ferris of you

A girl named fungus

My wife also banned the "tush push" in bed.

So what? Just cus he's in a coma I can't call him Mantits?!?

There's martyrs and there's farters

are you smarter than a cheeser grater?

The Velma erotic asphyxiation dreams are back

Torqued in the jorts

It's like the canary in the coal mine but it's just way up my ass

That's real bitch mcnugget of you

Mummified with full bush

Kids these days prolly already forgot about Dre

In the club cranking hog to Super Nanny

One Andor both of these balls your mouth

Bricked up at the quinceañera

Need a key bump of sad synths to make it through today

Nollie Front Side Flip to Fakie into the pussy

Ass so crazy it caused a ripple in the Force

Hey girl, I'm chewing on it like gristle