Profile avatar
garrettfpierce.bsky.social
Once, current, and future moron Formerly @garrettfpierce on Twitter
123 posts 31 followers 62 following
Prolific Poster
Conversation Starter
Posts 38 Comments 12

Happy to announce I’ve taken a new position with DOPS (Department of Pants Shitted)

submitted 17 hours ago • 0 comments

I think it's weird to still have your college be a major part of your identity after 30

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

If you burn my flag I'll jerk you off!!!

submitted 6 days ago • 6 comments

We smokin on that shit that made the series of events unfortunate

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

objectively the funniest way to convey this idea

submitted 14 days ago • 0 comments

we smokin on that shit that gave George that W bush

submitted 21 days ago • 0 comments

fuck weezer

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

i'd get my shit absolutely ROCKED by a gorilla, i'll tell you that much

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

Was just reminded of Cici’s Pizza, a lovely chain of pizza buffet restaurants of which I have thrown up in several

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

at this point I'm basically just shitposting in the form of hyper-specific bits directly to friends who would appreciate them. I can no longer shitpost for a general audience.

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

I have no bits, but I must tweet

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

Me waking up with some random song that I’ve not listened to in years stuck in my head.

submitted 33 days ago • 549 comments

About twice a year I have a deep regret that I never started a ska band in my 20s, this is one of those moments

submitted 33 days ago • 0 comments

pretty wild stuff when they let a dead person lie in state for a few days. It’s like “hey here’s this cadaver, come thru when you can”

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

tells JD Vance to get fucked on Easter Sunday and dies the next day. absolutely goated pope. you'll be missed, Francis.

submitted 36 days ago • 0 comments

honestly Armando goes hard as a first name

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

finally some good news

submitted 41 days ago • 0 comments

It’s hard to put into words how little I care about Coachella

submitted 43 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 47 days ago • 0 comments

lmao this sucks man

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

shut up about liminal stuff

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

I love when people walk around like they got that shit on when they definitively do NOT got that shit on

submitted 58 days ago • 0 comments

Putting “I promise to commit to your silly little bits” into my vows

submitted 69 days ago • 0 comments

enough time has passed, it's time for us to all admit that Arcade Fire sucks and always has sucked

submitted 74 days ago • 0 comments

With the regularity that people use the term “game changer” it would appear that the game itself is fluid, ever changing

submitted 81 days ago • 0 comments

you’re telling me a chicken fingered this sandwich?

submitted 83 days ago • 1 comment

this is some of the most embarrassing shit i could imagine, and a perfect portrait of the Dems today. entirely ineffective and just doing empty stunts

submitted 83 days ago • 0 comments

The feet are lowkey the hands of the legs

submitted 83 days ago • 0 comments

looking for some new words. what are some good words that i haven’t heard of

submitted 83 days ago • 1 comment

Disappointed that I can’t go to the bar to take my flu shot. Apparently it’s the needle kind 🥺😭

submitted 83 days ago • 0 comments

Dogs of Bluesky, what does getting in the elevator feel like? Is it similar to interdimensional travel for humans?

submitted 83 days ago • 0 comments

what variety of apple is the GOAT? if you say red delicious you immediately invalidate any opinion you have had in the past and will have in the future

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

In all honesty this is preferable to watching that movie consequence.net/2025/03/ceil...

submitted 85 days ago • 0 comments

@joshcirre.com hey Josh, I've been learning a ton from your videos on YouTube, you make really great stuff! I was curious what software you use to make your videos? They all look so good!

submitted 88 days ago • 1 comment

you'd think they just started mail service yesterday the way people act at the post office

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments

tfw a song from 2009 becomes a TikTok song and people ask if you’ve heard of it

submitted 89 days ago • 0 comments

tfw when bro actually has a job and doesn’t immediately respond to your banger joke, making you question if it was actually funny in the first place

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

Which presidents should be goated? Explain your reasoning

submitted 91 days ago • 1 comment