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jeffheavydog.bsky.social
manicposting pixie dream guy. "quality assurance" aka thing-breaker. he/him but not fussy about it. failed writer. old nerd. on a radicalization journey. some may find me annoying, and that is okay. mischief cryptid. shitposter semifinalist.
704 posts 6,732 followers 15,833 following
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Posts 45 Comments 5

andrew cummo sticky bummo loser energy maximummo

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

welcome to jackass

submitted 14 hours ago • 0 comments

pish pash posh i'm in the sauce!!!

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

urethral stretching ohhhhhhhhh yeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEE

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

i'm not even putting ice in my fuckin DRINKS anymore it's fuck ice forever babyyyyyyyyy

submitted 16 days ago • 9 comments

i dont know anymore thanks for all the fish

submitted 78 days ago • 2 comments

dr6unufyn5rnr5ybrynftubtfj

submitted 86 days ago • 1 comment

in the words of the immortal Pete & Bas: grab a hammer then squeeze

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

some of you talk like you're preparing for a debate as to which particular sort of tyrant you'd rather live under lmao you should be ashamed of yourselves you dumb fucking pissbabies

submitted 90 days ago • 0 comments

girl who introduces herself as a muggle but never elaborates

submitted 91 days ago • 0 comments

Rorschach:

submitted 91 days ago • 0 comments

the "democrat party"? you mean the chickenshit loser party of dorks?

submitted 91 days ago • 0 comments

the Overton Window should be pulled left until an idea like "punch Nazis" is the lamest, tamest start to the discussion and not a hot-button issue

submitted 92 days ago • 1 comment

i don't hate jazz but telling me to listen for the notes you're not playing is just gonna make me wanna punch you in your dissonant face

submitted 92 days ago • 0 comments

well if i don't have a gun what the fuck was i SUPPOSED to bring to the fight damn

submitted 93 days ago • 0 comments

waking up in a panicked sweat to thoughts of canadian drop bears

submitted 93 days ago • 0 comments

a sub Marine, you say? always loved a man in uniform, yes? well?

submitted 96 days ago • 0 comments

stubbing my toe like GEE GOLLY WILLICKERS HOT TAMALE WAZOO

submitted 98 days ago • 0 comments

no offense bluesky. i love you bluesky. but we need a lot less of these "RESIST always vote democrat BLUE WAVE BABY" accounts and more of the "i aspire to be the one to do exactly what we all know needs to be done. perhaps with a wrench." accounts.

submitted 99 days ago • 1 comment

the heavydog code 1) transfolks are friendfolks 2) punch nazis (with the bumper of your vehicle) 3) do your hobby without apology 4) post

submitted 100 days ago • 0 comments

baby i wanna lick you like a lollipop that's been dropped on the ground but still sorta looks okay if you blow it off good and kinda wipe it something maybe

submitted 103 days ago • 1 comment

hold the line! then twist it into a violent shape and stab it full bore into the heart of the wealthy

submitted 104 days ago • 0 comments

i love so many of you lol keep up the great work you fuckin freaks (oh except you, not you, you can go to hell)

submitted 105 days ago • 1 comment

"mandated licensure"

submitted 105 days ago • 1 comment

hey everybody turns out forklifts are a little more difficult to operate than i intended

submitted 107 days ago • 2 comments

LOOK OUT FUCK

submitted 110 days ago • 0 comments

Luigi

submitted 111 days ago • 0 comments

Luigi

submitted 112 days ago • 1 comment

smashmouth, mushmouth, cottonmouth, lakers in 6

submitted 114 days ago • 0 comments

don't play with me feelings just skip right ahead to stomping on them thank you

submitted 116 days ago • 0 comments

listening to DOOM soundtracks like yes bitch more please

submitted 117 days ago • 1 comment

if someone likes Trump, you have to kick em in the balls i don't make the rules sorry you gotta buck up and do it

submitted 118 days ago • 1 comment

n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r s l e e p n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k n e v e r b l i n k

submitted 120 days ago • 0 comments

never sip what you can slurp 😉

submitted 120 days ago • 0 comments

directions unclear, fan stuck in my dick

submitted 124 days ago • 0 comments

some of you are too goddamned cute and it's really messing with my day

submitted 127 days ago • 0 comments

listen. listen. i don't know SHIT. but YOU do. so go do it. fuckin hero.

submitted 127 days ago • 0 comments

bazooka joe and machine gun kelly

submitted 128 days ago • 1 comment

political action? bashing executives' heads in with bricks praxis? bashing executives' heads in with bricks as a treat? bashing executives' heads in with bricks

submitted 132 days ago • 2 comments

they should remake Total Recall every year and eventually charge for a service to forget viewings

submitted 134 days ago • 0 comments

nobody likes Sara Lee (?)

submitted 135 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 135 days ago • 95 comments

CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES THIS IS MY BLASTING PORTshit

submitted 135 days ago • 0 comments

cranks, yay or nay? nay? nay.

submitted 135 days ago • 0 comments

1 2 buckle your shoe 3 4 shut the door 5 6 pick up sticks 7 8 lay Nazis out straight 9 10 punch them again

submitted 137 days ago • 1 comment