jollyrobber.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

jollyrobber.bsky.social

Thoughts from the dark side of a married man. It is what it is and I ain't shit. (Not) New & (Certainly Not) Improved bsky.app/profile/jollyrobber.bsky.social/search My Musings https://tinyurl.com/2p9ruj7u Best? Of https://tinyurl.com/mry4284p

2,852 posts 5,038 followers 1,133 following

Posts 49 Comments 1

What to do with this multitude of microplastics and contempt.

submitted 3 days ago • 2 comments

Some of y’all need jobs 😭

submitted 1 hour ago • 0 comments

Activating my mother rescuing her child trapped under a car adrenaline fueled super strength and flinging my couch through the ceiling to get to the Snickers bar that slid underneath it

submitted 1 hour ago • 1 comment

Okay I'll bite – what's a wordle?

submitted 2 hours ago • 1 comment

Childhood was a confusing time. We don't lick things. But the Tootsio Pop Owl literally counted down licking to the center goodness. Also, we don't talk about sexual subtext.

submitted 13 hours ago • 3 comments

In the Indian government offices, they have bids to bulk order poultry at low prices. It's called a chicken tender.

submitted 52 minutes ago • 0 comments

Can't look at an avocado without thinking of Godzilla's nutsack.

submitted 52 minutes ago • 0 comments

Who squeezes the squids to fill the pens?

submitted 22 hours ago • 6 comments

happy pride to the 3 raccoons in this trench coat

submitted 58 minutes ago • 0 comments

I love that feeling when your sheets are clean and your house is good smelling and you’re not a fascist

submitted 23 hours ago • 5 comments

If you’re bad-ass you’re also beautiful, I don’t make the rules

submitted 1 hour ago • 5 comments

Hey I'm running late it's taking me a little longer than I thought to cancel and not come

submitted 472 days ago • 1 comment

Got dumped and now I’m heading to the beach for the week. The ocean better fucking fix me.

submitted 2 hours ago • 5 comments

so The Hatch Act has nothing to do with eggs huh

submitted 50 minutes ago • 1 comment

Store where they sell home decor: Wallmart.

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

Only open September through November: Fallmart

submitted 3 hours ago • 0 comments

Store where they sell shopping complexes: Mallmart

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

not to brag but i can do sex both of the ways

submitted 5 hours ago • 21 comments

me: I’m gonna start eating like an adult also me: has 19 pizza rolls for dinner and calls it ‘tapas’”

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

If I was a witch, I would curse people to have to poop right after showering

submitted 11 hours ago • 19 comments

"We must survive to save the species!" Do you mean the one that got us into this shit in the first place? Lol Nah, hon. We dead.

submitted 47 minutes ago • 0 comments

Eat me

submitted 47 minutes ago • 0 comments

Store for granny’s outerwear: Shawlmart

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

I need a platter featuring every style of french fry

submitted 2 hours ago • 3 comments

A bar where farting is encouraged call the Windy Peach

submitted 2 hours ago • 1 comment

Gonna have the wife put on her amish outfit and churn butter for me tonight.

submitted 44 minutes ago • 0 comments

Brb, gotta go answer an 18 question survey about my experience buying peanut butter

submitted 4 days ago • 3 comments

World War Threesome

submitted 56 minutes ago • 0 comments

Butts

submitted 1 hour ago • 3 comments

Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out for a Hero" is a very stressful song.

submitted 629 days ago • 6 comments

Same goes for you, Tuesday

submitted 1 hour ago • 0 comments

Store of tiny items: Smallmart

submitted 40 minutes ago • 0 comments

Store for everything: Allmart

submitted 15 minutes ago • 0 comments

Walmart for Nutsack accessories called Ballmart

submitted 3 hours ago • 1 comment

Warlock's supply store: Thrallmart

submitted 3 hours ago • 0 comments

Store for everything outside your bedroom: Hallmart

submitted 3 hours ago • 1 comment

Store of government requirements: Shallmart

submitted 3 hours ago • 1 comment

Store for all your crushes: Enthrallmart

submitted 3 hours ago • 1 comment

since the world is ending it feels like a good time to admit I was the one who voted for crash to win best picture

submitted 47 minutes ago • 12 comments

British bob Dylan: oi, ‘e answers blowin in the wind innit American beatles: she loves y’all yee-haw

submitted 10 hours ago • 1 comment

Your boss is gonna ask if your WiFi works from the fallout shelter

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

Ask not for who the chub rubs. It rubs for thee.

submitted 5 hours ago • 0 comments

It was the fuck this of times; it was the fuck that of times.

submitted 5 hours ago • 0 comments

Welcome to the Tits McDick Fan Club! I would teach you our secret handshake, but it’s basically just me grabbing your crotch.

submitted 4 hours ago • 3 comments

I'm on camera more than a porn star and fucked a lot less

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

there’s no lid on the koolaid man think of all the debris.

submitted 2 hours ago • 11 comments