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martydaxnger.bsky.social
dream big, fart loud
22 posts 40 followers 18 following
Regular Contributor
Posts 18 Comments 4

ya know what, it must feel good as fuck to absolutely queen out drunk with your friends in your hometown after your sports team wins. I see the vision

submitted 98 days ago • 0 comments

the next 5 years boutta be so weird

submitted 125 days ago • 0 comments

driving into work after receiving numerous air quality warnings from the weather app

submitted 132 days ago • 0 comments

if I had a nickel for every time this month that I got dressed to go to the gym and then immediately passed out on the couch I would have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice

submitted 140 days ago • 0 comments

the potato chip and chocolate combo is so goated

submitted 146 days ago • 0 comments

the forgotten banana on my counter watching me pull another bundle out of the grocery bag

submitted 160 days ago • 0 comments

migraine so bad I tried putting my shoes on before my socks this morning

submitted 168 days ago • 0 comments

shitposters, wya?

submitted 169 days ago • 0 comments

when the za hits and you start living in 3rd person perspective

submitted 171 days ago • 0 comments

got the the gym and realized I left my earbuds at home so now I have to drop the heaviest set of dumbbells on my head

submitted 174 days ago • 0 comments

trying to stay up to watch act 3 of arcane when it drops

submitted 178 days ago • 0 comments

just found out wicked is being released in 2 parts. lmao wdym?? we already know what happens, they drop a house on their home girl and tussle over a pair of kicks. come on now

submitted 179 days ago • 0 comments

need to be sitting on my couch under 2 blankets playing animal crossing and drinking a steaming chai latte out of one of these mugs

submitted 179 days ago • 0 comments

my face when a customer starts giving me attitude over the phone

submitted 181 days ago • 0 comments

sorry boss man, can’t come in today. the trees in the forest are whispering secrets to me and I must listen

submitted 182 days ago • 0 comments

ran out of milk for my coffee this morning so I used gasoline

submitted 183 days ago • 0 comments

anytime I hear “pizza party” in a corporate setting I immediately enter fight or flight

submitted 186 days ago • 0 comments

styrofoam is my mortal nemesis

submitted 186 days ago • 1 comment