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matthewsp.bsky.social
Delawarean. Workforce management professional, quiz bowl enthusiast, and Microsoft Excel MVP. Philadelphia sports enjoyer. I left The Bad Place.
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I spend a lot of time reading and posting about fictional depictions of Mars on BlueSky. I call that Barsoomscrolling.

When our battalion was deployed to the US-MEX border in the 1990s as part of JTF-6, our battalion commander gave us a separate rules of engagement brief, where he privately told us “Marines make horrible cops,” and that the mission was not well thought out.

Everything that’s happened over the past six months has been a response to an imaginary crisis. There is no immigrant invasion. No trade crisis. No scientific or governance crisis. Just people completely high off their own supply trying to fundamentally reorder society. None of this had to happen.

The Life360 ad (for a service I’d never heard of before) on the Tonys was some of the most “WTF?!” stuff I’ve seen in an ad for a while. What on earth were they thinking?

When non-citizens reside with you in your land, you shall not wrong them. Rather, the non-citizens who reside with you shall be to you as your citizens; you shall love each one as yourself, for you were non-citizens in the land of Egypt: I God am your God. Leviticus 19:33-34

In the last 20 or so minutes I’ve seen LAPD officers shove women to the ground without provocation, rip a sign out of a man’s hand and then swing a baton into his leg and raise a less-lethal launcher to aim directly at a protester (which I’m 99% is a major policy violation.)

My statement on what's unfolding in Los Angeles.

LAPD yesterday: Protests in the city have been peaceful… LAPD today: …and we’re here to fix that

This is a fever dream. The city is not under migrant occupation. This whole thing kicked off because ICE began an intense operation across the city to raid Home Depots and nail salons and places where random undocumented immigrants might be going about their day working a job.

Donald Trump incited a violent mob to attack the Capitol. Hundreds of dangerous felons who brutally beat police officers with impunity were then pardoned by the President on his first day in office. Don’t ever lecture America about law and order.

Los Angeles is not a war zone. The media keeps cropping the same damn photo to make it look like it is. There are plenty of live feeds going on right now that verify what is actually happening on the ground in real time. Nothing. The only unrest is coming from Trump & his thugs.

The illegitimate, lawless, and authoritarian regime in control of the government of the United States is at war with the people of the United States.

HAPPENING NOW: Aerial coverage of protesters marching peacefully in LA to protest ongoing ICE raid operations and Trump’s federalization of the National Guard Reporter: “What we’re looking at right now is a quiet, organized group and demonstrators marching peacefully to their destination.”

Hello. I live in Los Angeles. The president is lying.

Both statements are from last night. Note difference between how Trump characterizes conditions in LA ("RIOTS AND LOOTERS"), vs how the LAPD does ("Peaceful Protests")

Regardless of how well Lexington does in the finals, they will shatter the record for best finish by a JV team. The prior best result by a team of all sophomores or younger was 19th, set last year by Thomas Jefferson D #pacensc #quizbowl

It’s obvious but worth drawing out what raids of Home Depot’s of all places is about. It’s rounding up people who are really eager for work and for whom there is work, peoples whose labor is in demand. We know this but shows just how far it is from rounding up just the bad guys.

This story exemplifies the reason people are outraged at ICE. This guy did nothing wrong. He broke not a single law. He was a guard at a base that housed US troops. He came here legally through humanitarian parole. He had an asylum application pending. Yet the Trump admin had ICE grab him anyway.

Excellent headline

A lot of these folks think Trump is only kicking out dangerous criminals. They don't hear about the arbitrarily canceled visas and TPS and asylees who are following the rules. Huge messaging failure by Democrats.

Question for you #Excel users out there: what, for you, would comprise your own list of ten "fundamental" functions for basic competency? Mine, no particular order: IFS() XLOOKUP() SUMIFS() COUNTIFS() MIN() MAX() AVERAGE() MID() FILTER() UNIQUE()

There was a time when I'd rank IF() as one of the ~10 fundamental functions you have to know to have baseline #Excel competence. If I'm teaching someone brand new to Excel now, though, I'd skip it and go right to IFS(). Kind of like how XLOOKUP() made VLOOKUP() completely superfluous.

How now-DHS Secretary Kristi Noem felt about a president potentially federalizing the National Guard one year ago:

Strake Jesuit beats DCC, but Hunter beats Lexington! Strake Jesuit vs. Lexington will be played and streamed from the Rosemont Ballroom, and if the Texas squad wins they will emerge as #pacensc champions! www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEq2...

Why do these agents need masks and flak jackets to raid a nail salon? Are they afraid someone will threaten them with a pedicure?

He just said this is an American city and the First Amendment cannot be allowed.

Perhaps Newsom should have spent less time chumming around with authoritarian buffoons on his podcast and more time preparing and strategizing for the entirely predicable thing that is happening in his state right now.

With Musk gone, it’s time to start irritating Trump with “Stephen Miller is the person actually running the country.” Miller has survived longer than anyone in Trump’s orbit, so he’s clearly learned how to stroke Trump’s ego. But it can’t hurt to try. It also appears to be true. Terrifyingly so.

Have you fucking SJWs considered that if literally everything was different about this parade it would be cool

It is humiliating that someone wrote this and humiliating that the Atlantic chose to publish it.

Moran did not tweet a single untrue word.