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stilljoshy.bsky.social
Inconveniently sensitive. Dog dad x2. Bearded Masshole. Thinks he’s funny. Low opinion of humanity, but tryin real hard to be the shepherd, Ringo. I talk about music, dogs, movies, sports, food—everything that makes life worth living.
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I just asked if he really thought cramming into the armchair with me while I’m working is comfortable.

It’s 4:20, when the cool kids smoke their doobies. Meanwhile, I just finished vacuuming, which is its own kind of high, I suppose.

I remember, too A distant bell And stars that fell Just like the rain out of the blue When my life is through And the angels ask me to recall The thrill of them all Then I will tell them I remember you “I Remember You” —Victor Schertzinger & Johnny Mercer

Reskeet if you see your kink: Restraints Role-play Feeding the birds & squirrels Being crushed by a giant Praise Unconditional love Forehead kisses Grilled cheese sandwiches Tentacles Napping Universal healthcare

While I still have all this top notch illness bass in my voice, I really oughta go out and karaoke some Johnny Cash songs.

Not since Prohibition have so many Americans wanted to commit the same crime at once

I dropped my phone on my toe, so I’m listening to the love theme from Octopussy to console myself.

I just went over to position the two dogs together in the dog bed because they seemed unwilling to give each other room, and when it was done I added “See, this is how we share,” and it’s possible I’m spending too much time alone at home with them.

The world’s so totally off the rails right now that I’m afraid the Pope will die and somehow Trump will get to appoint Joel Osteen as his replacement.

I just paid a heating bill that cost more than what I paid in rent for my first apartment. 😳

In the new Captain America movie, a former Russian asset is running for Congress. Which seemed ludicrous to me until I remembered a current Russian asset is actually president, so real life is now officially more far-fetched than superhero movies. Not sure I love that for us.

Rainy afternoon. Feeling crappy. So I’ve decided to lay on the couch reading comic books and watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

Somebody gently rubbing my belly and telling me “you’re a good boy” would probably fix me.

Time to celebrate Valentine’s Day the way I do every year: slap on a diaper, go stand on the overpass and fire arrows into cars passing on the freeway. So, keep love in your hearts today, but more importantly, keep low. Xxxooxx!

I JUST realized I have a three-day weekend! I think I forgot about Presidents Day because I spend all my time trying to forget about the President.

If you see this, post a photo with no explanation.

Here’s a narrative I’ve never understood: “oh Ho Ho, look at all the silly men rushing out at the last minute on Valentine’s Day to buy flowers.” Flowers DIE. QUICKLY. Why would you get them at any time other than the last possible minute before you give them to someone? What am I missing?

My boss gave me pushback when I told him I was taking Michael McDonald’s birthday off as a religious holiday. In my defense, I cited the traditional hymn “Yah Mo B There,” which I think has settled things.