Profile avatar
sugarblind.bsky.social
ghastly & dubious hologothic hagette slenderman's sleep paralysis demon pale shadow of a woman
3,798 posts 207 followers 203 following
Prolific Poster
Conversation Starter

watching videos of golden orb weavers catching prey like "hey, girl, what that ass doooOHHH nooo!!!"

There's a beautiful strawberry moon tonight, full & pink & ethereal, slowly rising out of our graveyard. 🎶 Moon over graveyard Bring my love to me tonight Please resurrect her Underneath your silvery light Use necromancy Doesn't have to be fancy Moon over graveyard tonight🎶 🪦🌝🪦

Alert Sound xkcd.com/3100/

if you go digging on findagrave.com you might find out that one of your ancestors died in a sleigh accident. RIP Grandpa

When you buy dinner at a gas station with tables you'd better be prepared for a weird guy to choose the seat directly behind you from a sea of empty chairs, insert his hand down the back of his pants, and root around in his asscrack for a while, because that's what you're gonna get.

*NEW LAWSUIT ALLEGES 80'S BAND STARSHIP VIOLATED NUMEROUS BUILDING CODES

Why is AI so stupid that it can't even contextualize a typo? It makes me long for the days of "did you mean... 'sports car'?" bc what I don't need is 3 paragraphs of chicken-flavored lies about 'sports cats'. Now I'm just disappointed

I was at work for eight hours, and evidently all hell broke loose in the meantime??

I tried to make conversation w/an annoying colleague from NYC about The City We Became (NK Jemisin), and this woman wanted to argue w/me about every borough's personification except Bronx, and then told me flat out that the Staten Island character sounds completely wrong and-- I had to walk away.

Been a hot minute since I didn't want to go into work THIS MUCH I should have taken a personal day. I can feel the bad vibes all the way from the parking lot

Cats (2019)

i don't wanna hear anyone talking about "it's bad to burn a robo taxi," it's hilarious and nobody gets hurt the message is clear if you don't have shit in your eyes

Somewhere, John Gaius feels his eye twitch.

Just got a Google alert for my great-uncle's obituary, which is quite unpleasant enough, but apparently this is how I learn that my *other* great-uncles have also died. There's nothing to be done about it now, but still... booooo 👎

Oh sure, I'll drive right in there and get out of my car. Why don't I just shout my true name and make deals with strangers I meet on the path? How about I just have a little snack on some out-of-season fruit behind a gate in a little stone wall? Any elderly beggars I can be rude to? FOH

it's cool that you can't explore new things online without some clingy algorithm frantically interrogating you, "did you like that? do you want more like that? was it good for you? did you come??"

just one 24-hour day without the sound of any internal combustion engines would be paradise imagine being able to listen to the wind and the birds

Floodgates are open, team. It's happening.

This is the only meme you need.

the funniest thing about the “ice agents are human beings with families” line is that there is no evidence to support the claim. oh they’re real people? what are their names? as far as I’m concerned they’re the T-1000 until proven otherwise

No, it's true, the moon IS a lesbian

INT. CHINESE RESTAURANT LOBBY Enter millennial dad & adolescent son Very Teenage Son: So is she of the Catholic race? Chill Dad: Uhh, nnooo. Son: It's the same thing! Dad: Nnnn... it's not. Son: It is! Dad: Do you want to argue with 10 million Jews? Both exit

I'm the type of woman to pass you by, say "OOH!" and then yell back "I love your perfume!! You smell amazing!" at a pretty girl in a sundress she looked and smelled pretty but I didn't want to be a creep

Happy Pride to all the opposite-gender-partnered bisexuals and the opposite-gender-partnered bisexuals ONLY. Your sacrifices are recognized and saluted.

I name-searched my ex-boyfriend last night just for shits & giggles. Found a news article and immediately pulled up some court dockets, aaaand [drumroll please]: F1 ARSON F1 BURGLARY F2 [STATE-SPECIFIC CRIME] F3 CRIMINAL MISCHIEF ENDANGERMENT ENDANGERMENT ENDANGERMENT

Once, I captured a full video of a violent crime against a defenseless victim in public. (There was a 2nd victim in the house) The perpetrator was charged, took a plea, and served 6 years in state prison. During Covid. With no time off, no early release He's out. Think he's still mad at me?😬

This is an absolutely abhorrent & morally bankrupt take, but despite being horrendously wrong OP *does* actually make a very solid point about Eric being literally kissed by a rose, with an image from the book (my beloved) You can take Ghostrider with my blessing but you can't replace it with THAT

The important thing as this Trump v. Musk feud escalates is that I want them and their teams and all of their supporters to suffer as much pain and humiliation and degradation as is possible, and I feel as if a few strokes and fistfights and the odd stabbing would be proportional as well

today is like if three big boats full of billionaires got stuck in an imploding submersible piloted by henry kissinger

my psychiatrist just asked me for plant advice, so if you need me, I'll be polishing my mental health trophy in the solarium

I like to watch people's eyes bug out when I tell them I saw Radiohead open for Alanis Morissette but the best opener I ever saw was absolutely Cyndi Lauper. She still ran & danced & rolled around onstage at all of 60yo, and she's really preserved her voice. 10/10 🪩🩷

This is how my brother and I relate! We send each other gifts and act like we've pulled off the greatest capers in history. One time he sent me kittycat socks. “OHHH, I GOT YOU GOOD ...reliable footwear!" So I got him a sculpture carved by our great-granddad. "HA! TAKE THAT....home and cherish it."

alt text: the mobster tycoon grappling with the techbrat tycoon while ecstatic bluesky dot com users get hilariously baked, as represented by two blonde girls and a dark-haired kid who's hitting the bong while wearing the ghost of a shit-eating grin

This is the best day on Bluesky since the night Trump got COVID on Twitter

people tell me that I walk like I'm on my way to show someone their own kidneys, but that's only because I'm usually thinking about how anybody-who-bothers-me is gonna find out how little I actually know about anatomy, which is arguably much worse. either way, viscera