xlrtificer.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

having a crush is so embarrassing i’m fantasizing about holding someone’s hand meanwhile they’re experiencing an inner life so rich and bountiful that to comprehend it would vaporize me

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

friend asked “whats a boyfriend jean” i said “a horny nucleotide sequence” nobody laughed

submitted 21 days ago • 2 comments

to those for whom loud music is imminent, we honor thee

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

a zoomer made fun of me for using “post 9/11” as a description of a piece of art we are so cooked

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

(giving speech before birthday party) Thank you all for joining me in cherishing what is sure to be one of my last periods of sanity and coherence.

submitted 25 days ago • 1 comment

gazing into the abyss asking what that maw do

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

bleeding out of my ear for no apparent reason, this bodes well for my career as a professional listener

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

you ever think about how, fundamentally, bands dont need to play good to be cool they just need to BE cool

submitted 33 days ago • 0 comments

eat once shit twice

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

heavy metal vocalist whose main influence is glen danzig but habitually wanders into jack black territory

submitted 39 days ago • 0 comments

Anita Bryant (she/her)

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

one time i was at a wake for a friend who killed himself and people were passing around a guitar to do singalongs but then one guy started Third Eye Blind’s “Jumper” absolutely wrecked the vibe it was amazing

submitted 51 days ago • 0 comments

last one left at the venue, wrapping cables, drunk guy stumbles in looks at me and says “whats up” i said “makin it happen” he said “type shit” and stumbled back out

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

hit two new transition goals: a middle aged man asked to marry me in line at the gas station, & then later, a different middle aged man saw me about to lift a heavy amp & yelled “you can’t carry all that, you’re a WOMAN” is there a word for when people make you feel bad in a way that is affirming

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

“i did crack once on accident” thats crazy i did it a bunch of times on purpose

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

feeling down? fish n chips will bring you up, fish pakora will save you, catfish & grits will exterminate the concept of suffering deep fried fish deep fried fish deep fried fish i love you

submitted 63 days ago • 0 comments

ants on a log was an alien concept to me until my adult years, i had seen ants in the soil and in ants in the pantry, most logs i turned were found to contain grubs or termites

submitted 64 days ago • 1 comment

i have a fetish for being possessed as if by a poltergeist or ghoul. my lover charges into psychic battle wearing me like a suit of armor and we both die

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

frequency range overrated/over-hated: 50 hz: overrated 250 hz: over-hated 320 hz: overrated 615 hz: overrated 800 hz: over-hated 2.5 khz: over-hated 15 khz: overrated

submitted 65 days ago • 1 comment

my haters are mad: i gave away my last 25 roubles to a widow for her late husband’s funeral after insuring he was cared for by a doctor, with family and a priest at his side, as his life slipped between their fingers

submitted 65 days ago • 1 comment

i am bearing the terrible weight of an oracle’s dreams, i am stumbling into the house party delirious, i am asking the shawtys from whence they come that the answer may one day be my tongue

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

my husband (evil) has to travel for a conference so i am learning yoga to fold myself in his suitcase in order that he may keep a closer eye while he is gone

submitted 65 days ago • 1 comment

i wasnt made for the apps i was made to sit atop a grassy hillside in a skirt, hair blown asunder by the wind, and wonder when my lover would appear from the treeline with an apple for me

submitted 65 days ago • 0 comments

they’re making transgender hormones for dogs

submitted 71 days ago • 0 comments

i am not a type of lgbt that most people can anticipate. i feel like i have more in common with genghis khan than with a theater kid. the one and only lady gaga lyric i regularly think about is “sexual tic tac toe." why did she say sexual tic tac toe

submitted 71 days ago • 22 comments

CALL HER A LOVE SUPREME THE WAY SHE LEAVE ME BREATHLESS

submitted 73 days ago • 1 comment

i had a dream i performed a mouth to mouth waterfall cascade of wine with a bunch of people to open up a party and all my high school friends were there and looked horrified but all my friends now were horny about it i think it means i’ve grown a lot in life

submitted 75 days ago • 0 comments

i should call her

submitted 76 days ago • 0 comments

hung out w a newish friend one on one for the first time and made pizzas from scratch and watched a movie and got drunk and oh no this is a crush this is a big big crush oh fuck oh shit

submitted 77 days ago • 1 comment

what if fleet foxes was power metal? what if shakira was post punk? what if mastodon was synth wave? what if you killed yourself

submitted 78 days ago • 0 comments

had multiple cis loved ones commend me for my resilience in the face of being legislated out of existence i don’t wanna be resilient i wanna fuck and make music and smoke weed and play video games

submitted 81 days ago • 0 comments

Called In! after a double

submitted 81 days ago • 0 comments

stood up! at the cocktail bar

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

found out i’m not going to win the most problematic trans girl in town award :( if u need me i’ll be in my room listening to Vulgar Display Of Power

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments

ready for the influx of terminally online trans girls moving to baltimore city from red states who will have a panic attack every time someone calls them “hon”

submitted 86 days ago • 0 comments

there is a guy in this dive bar wearing a suit and playing an unplugged electric bass

submitted 86 days ago • 1 comment

just watched the entire dvd menu of The People’s Joker after watching the movie so Vera Drew if you’re reading this i’m single and ready to love again

submitted 87 days ago • 0 comments