in your dying moments you see a Jackie Chan style closing credits blooper reel of all the times you hurt yourself - ThreadSky

juniorhoncho.bsky.social • 64 days ago

in your dying moments you see a Jackie Chan style closing credits blooper reel of all the times you hurt yourself

Comments

this is why tall people have shorter lifespans than short people, they gotta block out more time to account for all the times we hit our head

jamesofseattle.bsky.social•64 days ago

“ … so I’ve got that going for me …”

tonymcfee.bsky.social•64 days ago

Physically or emotionally?

juniorhoncho.bsky.social•64 days ago

do you know who Jackie Chan is

tonymcfee.bsky.social•64 days ago

I was imagining a series of vignettes of him walking up and hitting people with withering one liners. Brutal.

elmore.zone•64 days ago

stopped reading after "in your dying moments you see a Jackie Chan" cause I've heard all I need where do I sign

wanderingincode.bsky.social•64 days ago

I'm over 40, I pulled something throwing away a napkin

trixienorton.bsky.social•64 days ago

That would give me an extra year of life, at least.

cppilgram.bsky.social•64 days ago

Oh good a chance to relive my entire life in real time.

oakcroissant.bsky.social•64 days ago

And for a moment you see people around, your fam and friends breaking out of character

pete-moran.bsky.social•64 days ago

My wife and i die at the exact same time and it takes me a full two weeks extra to join her in the after life.

msmeredith.bsky.social•64 days ago

I would love this

cranilla13.bsky.social•64 days ago

Does emotional damage count?

tootru.bsky.social•64 days ago

i'm gonna live forever

epee.cc•64 days ago

That's just life!

douglasdangleposh.bsky.social•64 days ago

So I just get to relive my life then?

papersnail.bsky.social•64 days ago

I would go to church if they made this canon

stopmaggot.bsky.social•64 days ago

In first person or third person?

shadowflag8.bsky.social•64 days ago

Oh good call! That's gotta be third person!!!

leo-atreides.bsky.social•64 days ago

Well you die laughing knowing that you tried. Fell when you jumped and picked yourself up only to build guard rails for everyone else.

mahmoudshaat143.bsky.social•58 days ago

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ianmalcolm.bsky.social•64 days ago

This will almost double my original lifespan. I'm probably going to need to sleep through some of it.

edendestruction.bsky.social•64 days ago

Bonk

wolfesghost.bsky.social•64 days ago

You might enjoy Defending Your Life from the perspective of this happening, but it's the afterlife and other people are sitting with you and judging everything to determine if you're an idiot or not.

steveevelibertine.bsky.social•64 days ago

I totally thought of Defending Your Life too! I feel like I'd get sent back for being too combative with the prosecutors

late-buddy-ryan.bsky.social•64 days ago

Same! Now I’m trying to focus on Richard Jenkins’s klutzy death scene in ep 1 of Six Feet Under.

chetdiamond.bsky.social•64 days ago

Looking forward to the one where I slice my ankle doing Darth Maul shit with a curtain rod.

hikeandbikempls.bsky.social•64 days ago

Sounds like when I did an Eddie Van Halen move with my guitar but I was on the top bunk and I shattered the ceiling light fixture which fell and sliced my knuckle open. Love to look cool doing cool things.

gaynerd27.bsky.social•60 days ago

Is it just the times I *actually* hurt myself, or does it also include when I lightly bumped into furniture and said “ow” on reflex?

thukpa.bsky.social•64 days ago

Oh, so like the time I sprained my wrist playing cats cradle with my son at the ripe old age of 45?

jeffatlee.bsky.social•64 days ago

Cool way to go

foxy99.bsky.social•64 days ago

I’m gonna live forever 🎶

michaeljameshawk.bsky.social•64 days ago

Lol. Love it!

hcvt.bsky.social•64 days ago

Can’t wait to relive the time I fell into a manhole near the finish line of a 5k

syzygyx42.bsky.social•64 days ago

god tier oopsie

elchicosuave.bsky.social•64 days ago

Lol nice

keith-from-it.bsky.social•64 days ago

Wow I wasn’t actually wearing a shoe

ilovaussiesheps.bsky.social•64 days ago

Longest fucking death scene ever cuz I am one clumsy fucker!

fitgeekuk.bsky.social•53 days ago

If they include the times I hurt myself mentally then I'm pretty much reliving my whole life

elirirz.bsky.social•64 days ago

I want this sorted by type of injury. Half an hour of a bumping my head on things montage followed by 20 minutes of stubbed toes.

socialistboghag.bsky.social•64 days ago

Don’t forget the mind-erasing pain from funny bone hits!

sjrozan.bsky.social•64 days ago

I will take a very long time to die.

slaglore.bsky.social•64 days ago

Best humble-brag ever!

jessethegray.bsky.social•64 days ago

This is just a Tuesday for me

madammimm.bsky.social•64 days ago

Shit, I'll be there all night then. Poor EMS guys are going to be working up a storm and 15 minutes later I'm only halfway through the laugh track.

relaxedninja.bsky.social•64 days ago

That's interesting because none of my victims have said this.

scrappyaf.bsky.social•64 days ago

I was a clumsy child, the stuff of family legend, and I can’t wait to see the reel!

Ie. I shattered the storm door with my face at my 4th bday party. Good times.