thinks about that part of the bible where onan jerked it and as soon as his cum hit the ground god was like what the hell dude you missed and then exploded him with a lightning bolt
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remember that one time when one of noah's kids accidentally saw him naked, and when he woke up he got pissed and sentenced everyone down that kid's bloodline to be slaves to the other 2?
God was like have sex with this woman or die. Bro didn’t want to, bro didn’t do anything wrong for just having a good time alone. Most unfair bible dead.
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"m-my lord? you were w-watching?"
*lightning strike*
IS THAT REAL