Love writing satire? Dream of the high-stakes, low-paying world of freelance comedy writing? Well then today is your lucky day. From now until February 26th you can submit to become a writer for the Beaverton. More info on the page below!
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Whelp, need to whip up sone satirical posts to give examples of my work now. Not because they don't already exist, but because 50 years have passed since 2020, no way in hell am I remembering where they all are
Yeah, in these times where satire is sometimes more realistic than reality, I always have to double check that references to The Beaverton isn’t actually to the Beaverton Valley Times.
Just follow Donald Trump in the news. 🗞️ Who needs satire when the real thing is more ridiculous & absurd than anything we can come up with to mock it. 🤷🏽
In other news, today marks the 2nd time in history Canadians actually claimed to love beavers. The first time was in a hotel in Whitehorse, just after confederation, & the phrase OH GAWD! GAWD! GAWWWWDDD! was heard right after.
Investigations are ongoing at said hotel.
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It's not a moral stand. I'm just lazy.
Headline #3 in my submission:
"Westcoast Shut-in Preps Beaverton Submission."
You’re welcome.
There indeed is a city named Beaverton in Oregon.
Nice!
https://beavertonoregon.gov/
https://www.beavertonvalleytimes.com/
Investigations are ongoing at said hotel.