I couldn't waste my life looking after a child who would be born into a totally bewildered home, wondering why he had only one father instead of two, or even if the two of us were together, what would one of us say if we died on the war field?
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When you sent Price to confront me, informing me that you weren't infertile and saying that you couldn't “wait to be a happy family”, how do you think I felt? Anger was the only emotion, I felt deceived by the person I trusted the most.
Now, I need you to understand that I can't give up my future for a child who would be born into a dysfunctional family, or put the child up for adoption, that would leave a moral weight on my mind that I can't bear.
So I'll just tell you straight out, Simon. I'm no longer pregnant.
The paper next to this letter will tell you what happened, but by now you should recognise that I had an abortion. Believe me, it was one of the hardest decisions of my life.
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I can't wait for you Simon Riley, I can't.
And if a similar problem arose in the future with a child in the middle, would you run away again? Run away until you got your head round it?
I'm not saying you're a bad person, but I can't stay with someone who still has problems that need to be dealt with. And the same goes for me.
The paper next to this letter will tell you what happened, but by now you should recognise that I had an abortion. Believe me, it was one of the hardest decisions of my life.
I'm sorry, Si, I can't forgive myself, but I'll be looking for that in the future, for myself.
Please don't contact me. We'd better go our separate ways from now on.
Goodbye, my dear Simon.