It's been brought up before I know but I wonder if a "request invite" button could be the right call. Yes, you can do the same by just asking, but that's an extra hurdle to get over vs just pressing a simple button.
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Having this as an option/alt to contacts only would be a great solution. "User in an invite only world" with a request button that pings the host would be a good idea to consider.
In cases like this where people are in contacts only sessions or such, the request could be forwarded on to the host, so they could invite/send a friend request or something to let the requester join.
Or in the case of a headless, having an option in the config where you can add people to a specific (new?) role that is responsible for managing requests. Or by default it can forward requests to people with highest permission level.
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