USPS Clerk: anything liquid in this package?
Me: No
Clerk: *sloshes package*
Package: *takes 15 seconds to stop swaying back & forth*
Me: I mean, what is 'liquid' anyway? It's just a state of matter.
Clerk: ...
Me: You're hung up on A STATE OF MATTER!!!
Clerk: ...
Me: the burden of proof is on you.