There’s always something more that you can believe you should have, and if you don’t you’re failing. Get an agent? Now you need a book deal. Get a book deal? It wasn’t a big enough book deal. Get a pretty big book deal? It should have gone to auction. Went auction? You don’t get sprayed edges. - ThreadSky

charlottestein.bsky.social • 1 day ago

There’s always something more that you can believe you should have, and if you don’t you’re failing. Get an agent? Now you need a book deal. Get a book deal? It wasn’t a big enough book deal. Get a pretty big book deal? It should have gone to auction. Went auction? You don’t get sprayed edges.

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sprestonduncan.bsky.social•1 day ago

Yup. I thought all I wanted was a book out in the world. Now I have that and I need more sales, reviews, maybe an award or two

laforesta1.bsky.social•1 day ago

OMG yes it's never ending. So insidious. And none of us are immune. Sigh. "It should have gone into multiple printings. "It should've earned out." "It should've made the best sellers list."

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

Lol I’ll confess, not so long ago my book went into its third printing. And not only have I thought but my second book hasn’t, I also saw an author say they’d gone into a fourth printing and thought I really should have hit that too if I was actually a success. It’s the most fucked up thing.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

My agent looks at me like I’ve gone round the twist sometimes because the other thing is, my publishing past means I NEVER feel safe. Ever. I always think well surely this isn’t enough because it was never before.

laforesta1.bsky.social•1 day ago

Oh I KNOW Courtney was like "BE KIND TO YOURSELF. Comparison is the thief of joy. Screw other people. You summoned the grit to keep going and earned this success! Do you realize how rare that is? SO many people can't/don't stick it out. YOU ARE EXCEPTIONAL!"

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

She is always just mystified lol. On our last call she told me what my next royalty check was when I was talking about fearing everything was going poorly, and then I burst into tears.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

And I am still terrified.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

Do get sprayed edges? You should have had a starred review. Get a starred review? You should have more of them. Get more? You should have better Goodreads numbers. Get the numbers? Your sales should have been better. Sales are fab? You should have hit a list. And so on.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

And it can all make you really resentful, too. But there are so many factors that go into all of this. So much stuff, some toxic, some not, that isn’t your fault, or the fault of that other author who did get it. You are not a screw up. Don’t let it eat you alive.

laforesta1.bsky.social•1 day ago

That's the thing. SO MUCH OF IT is out of our control and we're still expected to hit all those imposed (self or otherwise) goalposts. I keep saying every writer must have a masochism streak. Sigh.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

Publishing thrives on you beating yourself up, or seething over other authors who have done no wrong.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

Also if you’re looking for techniques to combat this, I have many of them. In particular, they got me through five years of no books out, publishers dropping me, not even good enough for digital first: think about what you DO have that is more than what 99% people who try ever have.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

Embrace what you feel bitter or sad over. Or at least, focus on the books and authors that make you feel sad who you know you would support if you didn’t. Learn to separate out resentment from what you actually like or dislike.

charlottestein.bsky.social•1 day ago

Remember the snapshot. Every single author there has massive failures in their past, or massive failures waiting for them. You’re seeing the snapshot of success. For all you know, you are in the snapshot before success. Same as the perfect insta influencer life making you feel bad that you’re a mess

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