The Republican Speaker's chief of staff drunkenly crashed a Tesla after listening to Trump's speech? Sure thing, lazy metaphor. OK. - ThreadSky

kevinmkruse.bsky.social • 11 days ago

The Republican Speaker's chief of staff drunkenly crashed a Tesla after listening to Trump's speech?

Sure thing, lazy metaphor. OK.

Reposted from Ryan J. Reilly “paints a vivid and urgent portrait of… disarray”

NEW: After Mike Johnson's chief-of-staff crashed his white Tesla into a black Chevy after Trump's speech at the Capitol last week, he was "staggering" and slurring his speech as he tried to use voice activation to open his glove compartment, according to police.

www.nbcnews.com/politics/pol...

Comments

gesau.bsky.social•11 days ago

To be fair, he did the relatively more responsible thing: driving drunk instead of relying on the tesla FSD option.

deadseriousrick.bsky.social•11 days ago

They don't say it outright, but… black Chevy Suburban? They're describing a cop car. He drunkenly smashed into a cop car.

istilldissent.bsky.social•11 days ago

Charges will be dropped…

meggr99.bsky.social•11 days ago

No MSM coverage on this?

classikmeef.bsky.social•11 days ago

Basil Hayden Haynes

maireathena.bsky.social•11 days ago

All three executive branches and their staff should be randomly drug/ alcohol tested.

gaforever.bsky.social•11 days ago

A Tesla? What a sweet detail!

fudt.bsky.social•11 days ago

Who wouldn’t need a drink after that speech?

jonwilsonauthor.bsky.social•11 days ago

Seriously. No screenwriter could get away with that.

knowbetterbebetter.bsky.social•11 days ago

I can’t believe Hayden Haines is a real name

shuadc.bsky.social•11 days ago

Maybe this is the Tesla Trump plans to buy today?

unclesamson.bsky.social•11 days ago

Guessing Telsa FSD doesn't work for drunks?

wsr3.bsky.social•11 days ago

It actually uses AI to mirror the capacity of the owner.

unclesamson.bsky.social•11 days ago

God help Krasnov. Crash & Burn baby, burn.

bozo777.bsky.social•11 days ago

I think Hegseth has found his new drinking buddy

thirdsunrising.bsky.social•11 days ago

Yet another Trump administration DUI hire?

nicadispatch.bsky.social•11 days ago

To be fair, I too would be a raging and reckless alcoholic if I worked for that guy

jawstudios.bsky.social•11 days ago

Simultaneously ironic

efnbsbun.bsky.social•11 days ago

mlroff.bsky.social•11 days ago

It’s possible that the only way these traitors can cope with their betrayal is to drown themselves in alcohol. Nah…that would mean they actually have a conscience.

prof-survivor.bsky.social•11 days ago

That is the most generous possible take!

mlroff.bsky.social•11 days ago

I’ve not a reserve of generosity toward that den of iniquity. Greedy, grasping, grubby sycophants.

prof-survivor.bsky.social•11 days ago

Nary a redeeming quality among them all.

mjz1957.bsky.social•11 days ago

If you worked for the churchy pervy guy and had to listen to 2 hours of Trump’s gibberish, wouldn’t you take a drink or seven?

rednekulo.bsky.social•11 days ago

Trump crashed a TSLA without getting drunk.

styrso.bsky.social•11 days ago

The part where his speech was too slurred to be recognized by the voice-controlled glovebox took some imagination tho.

sarahay.bsky.social•11 days ago

Ha ha ha ha too drunk to use voice activation!

adirewolf.bsky.social•11 days ago

Wait...it gets even better!

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/donald-trump-promise-to-elon-musk_n_67cfe071e4b06805784b1a41

dohman.bsky.social•11 days ago

guess he wasn't using the self-driving function...or was he?

malaclypse.bsky.social•11 days ago

https://bsky.app/profile/malaclypse.bsky.social/post/3lk2sw5b4ss24

brosemitesam.bsky.social•11 days ago

He woulda gotten away with it if he was just drunk driving. It was the Tesla autopilot that did him in.

bellathelab.bsky.social•11 days ago

Can’t they find anyone who is not an abuser of one kind or other?

prof-survivor.bsky.social•11 days ago

It's a core competency under Trump.

eltorosolo.bsky.social•11 days ago

drunkenly crashed it into a *black* American icon, no less

chief1970p.bsky.social•11 days ago

I hope the guy he hit is MAGA and I wanna see his face when Mike’s special little pissboy gets off scot free. FAFO, asshole.

tauriq.bsky.social•11 days ago

if you pitched this as a scene in house of cards or something, you would get kicked out the writers room

prof-survivor.bsky.social•11 days ago

I JUST said this exact thing to my husband.

onedimental.bsky.social•11 days ago

Our reality sim is definitely incorporating procedurally AI-generated side plots with all the AI quality that we have come to loathe and disrespect.

bobdunkin.bsky.social•11 days ago

Don't forget, earlier that day they 'honoured' a family whose father was killed by a drunk driver!

pbmiller63.bsky.social•11 days ago

Drinking and driving is a big mistake.
Drinking because your boss thinks God speaks to him is understandable!

vivekr.bsky.social•11 days ago

This stuff is always tricky. The guy basically hit every checkmark for problem drinking in the one night we know about. Also, was he a voice in the room pitching sanity and some amount of Congressional independence and getting overruled? 🤷‍♂️

fry69.dev•11 days ago

Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction...

sambotz.bsky.social•11 days ago

He was arrested like 30 mn after the SOTU, so he was pounding em during the speech, hahaha.

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