I’m tired. I’m lonely. I’m unhealthy. I think this is called ambiguous grief. I had another heartbreak this week when a close friend told me “pain and suffering” is repellant to them. Noted. Another door closed.
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Things will ease up when we start hospice, we’ll have more support and even thought I look forward to more support it’ll mean he’ll be closer to joining the ancestors and I’m not ready for that either. It’s all emotional whiplash, I feel like I’ve stepped outside of time.
Love and ease to all caretakers. I see you, I love you. This is a sacred act, hard and holy. May we one day be cared for with as much love as we offer.
Lizz, i'm so sorry about your father's illness. I understand some of this personally but not to the effect you are going through it. Caretaking for another is such a thankless job that sucks so much out of the person and that they have you is a miracle. I'm praying for you and for your family.
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