When you’re in a relationship with a malignant narcissist—as we all are now with Trump—it’s important to stay out of emotionally reactive mode and instead to observe and act with detachment.
Emotional reactivity draws you into their defensive structure, and you can take in their toxic projections.
Emotional reactivity draws you into their defensive structure, and you can take in their toxic projections.
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It’s easy to do nothing.
We aren't in maga's "reality"; it helps to detach & observe these strange life forms that may kill us, but we don't have to go crazy while they do.
Also - please try NOT to listen to his voice at any point. Watch the videos if you want to, but do not listen to his voice. Just watch his body language, and try to read subtitles if possible. It removes a level of emotional response.
Wonderful! Going to use this!
You might notice you’re lashing out more at others or directing the feelings inward, which can lead to suicidal ideation.
Malignant narcissists don’t change, but they can change you, if you’re not careful.
The most effective way to detach is to end contact altogether. While we can limit our exposure to Trump, we don’t have that option.
We can, however, practice not being emotionally reactive and observing instead—“he’s doing that thing he does again”—and then act rather than react.
Detachment and observation take conscious practice, but they are critical and worth the effort.
The first step is gaining awareness (which you now have).
What’s interesting is how many people have sadistic fantasies about him who otherwise don’t (including me). That can be the projection to which I’m referring or just a manifestation of our own psyches.
Probably fine in moderation like most things.
Trump has a pattern of behavior going back decades evidencing a severe form of pathology often called “malignant narcissism.”
Many other mental health professionals have agreed.
George - your work & reporting has kept me sane.
But it’s predictable if you have—and predictability serves to our advantage because it makes remaining in a detached observational state easier. It just takes practice.
Failure to see his psychopathy has to be a choice in many cases.
First time around w/ Trump I was way too emotionally attached.
This time around that man is not going to invade my psyche. Made that decision as I watched the swing states turn red on my tv screen in Nov.
So far it's working...
15 minutes first thing in the morning
But there *are* people that you can lash out at.
And part of the problem is that those people feel they can support Trump without consequences.
So make there be consequences.
But it’s possible. Don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t master it all the time; we’re only human and you trying is noble in itself.
Heartwarming words. Thank you. 💙🐝💙
Thank god I’ve had years of practice being the scapegoat; otherwise I’d be in worse shape. I never thought my father being shitty would ever help, but here I am, preparing myself against Nazis.
No wonder my generation and Gen Z’s raising their kids with as few boundaries as possible; growing up with parents like ours it’s hard to know what’s too far.
But we can learn to do it more consistently than not.