I'm so tired of the discourse around physical attributes that people can't control. Everyone thinks the other side has it better, but nobody has lived anybody else's experience. How about we just shut the fuck up instead.
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Yes this is specifically about height this evening and I don't super care who I upset. Do tall people generally "have it easier" in society? Without a doubt, to a point. The ideal range for "tall" is probably capped out at 6'3" before you become an inconvenience to everyone around you.
Being stared at with my husband is just a fact of life. Is it because we're tall? Because we're gay? Because we're tall AND gay? Who knows. You get used to eyes being on you. We're both on the spectrum, and I have GAD. Always wondering if something's wrong with me and that's why people are looking.
Being physically larger than your peers growing up also instills a bunch of shame around your height, because I was bullied relentlessly as a kid — but I was always the one in trouble, because "you're bigger" and "you should know better". That fucks you up long term.
I was eight years old the first time I was told I was "too intimidating" and "that's why he has trouble making friends". So I learnt to let people approach me. But they don't, because I'm "too intimidating". It's an endless cycle.
The same issue persists in modern day adult life. I've noticed that people will engage with me if I start a conversation, is it because they want to, or because they're scared not to? So I just don't. That reads as being standoffish to a lot of people.
I know enough tall people thanks to my husband to know that a lot of us have this sort of experience, with a few details changed here and there. The grass isn't always greener on the other side and you never know the reasons someone is the way that they are, so maybe drop the generalisations.
The keywords in my original post were "that they can't control". Things like eye colour, hair colour, height, etc. I'm sorry for believing that people shouldn't be shamed for their genetics.
Oh, I don’t believe they should. But as a society we value certain traits more, and we treat people very different based on those. I honestly would say we shouldn’t shame people for things they can change too lol
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