treat other people. It's heartbreaking. But I have nowhere else to go to cope with it. The few non-internet "friends" I still have are so faux-tolerant it hurts. Absolutely willing to agree in silence but not out loud and even then I'm still called weird or too different in private to get any sense - ThreadSky

levion.bsky.social • 63 days ago

treat other people. It's heartbreaking. But I have nowhere else to go to cope with it. The few non-internet "friends" I still have are so faux-tolerant it hurts. Absolutely willing to agree in silence but not out loud and even then I'm still called weird or too different in private to get any sense

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levion.bsky.social•63 days ago

of catharsis anyway. I'm just stuck here hating where my life led me to and trying so hard to claw my way out of this hole for a sense of personal principle and yet I'm surrounded on all sides by people with shovels instead of rope.

It's so strange too because I'm definitely NOT depressed because

levion.bsky.social•63 days ago

I know what that feels like. I was so horribly depressed in the years up until I finally removed myself. The last few have been the happiest years of my life. This year could've been if not for dealing with such an avalanche of negativity. It's put me in a state of total despair, not depression. I'm

levion.bsky.social•63 days ago

not sad, I feel fucking hopeless. Completely and utterly hopeless. And I haven't severed the last few threads that are still clinging on to my upbringing yet because I'm scared to. I know I need to, but I think if I lose the few people I have left, Idk what I'll do with myself. It's still a self-

levion.bsky.social•63 days ago

inflicted misery like anything in the past but I feel like I'd be destroying any dignity I have left if I decided to rescind. I'd rather die with that than live knowing it's all a bunch of bullshit. I'm just sick of being caught between a rock and a hard place. Yeah I guess it's supposed to be

levion.bsky.social•63 days ago

uncomfortable but that doesn't mean I have to like it any more, I guess.

I just wanna say sorry to the people I've hurt and the asinine things I've said in confidence in the past. I wish I could undo a lot of it.

Anyway rant over I guess whatever. Hope some more CEOs die this year. That'd be cool

diemerald.bsky.social•62 days ago

Not that this helps fix the situation really, but if you ever feel like coming halfway across the country to get away from all that, my doors are always open. I'm still here for you any time, even if I'm not physically present…!

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