one of my deepest beliefs, problematic as it may be, is that men are so encouraged to express their big feelings all the time that they basically don't have real feelings (unless they're saintly enough to actually avoid imposing on other people)
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I regularly think about and reference this Wallace interview with Pearl Buck in which he asks if she thinks if there’s any real difference between men and women and she says of course, men are more emotional, more romantic in their thinking.
i don't think you can understand what it's like to feel real emotions if you're constantly externalizing and making every thing you feel in the moment other people's problem. unfortunately most men do that
in my perception this is an absolutely massive gulf between the sexes. it seems to be less pronounced with younger people, like under 30, but it's an abyss with the 40+ crowd
not talking about things like clinical depression or whatever, those can strike anyone and are a separate conversation. and we all know the hot girl who cries for attention because everyone treats her as an adult child. but in general
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