I was emotionally abused by my ex wife for years, which led me to believe I'd be totally helpless without her. When I did finally grow enough balls to leave her ass, all her friends hated me because she convinced them all that I was the problem. Can confirm, this shit's real.
sadly despite this all is true, i can never confront ppl who abused me emotionally, despite cutting contact they still qoute me in their bios and assume it is poetic of some sort, i spent a year crying over them, i might be lonely now, but it is better then being with them when they exclude me alway
That's the kicker. You think you'll see it. But you don't until you're already too sunken cost into that relationship. I broke up with my abusive ex at least 35 times, forgave her TRYING TO KILL me when I tried leaving her for someone else. She has a bsky and when she sees this;
I had an abusive relationship last year and I can’t express just true this is. I was abused emotionally and sexually. And I never realized how bad it was til she left cause I was pressured sm not to criticize how she treated me.
Not realizing how bad things were until after is very relatable. Despite the damage it does in the moment, emotionally abusive stuff is very easily shrugged off as "normal," either completely unproblematic or petty discontentment ("everyone else does this, I'm just being weird").
I was ashamed of my sex-aversion for months despite being fully accepting of it for *6 years* leading up to my abuse. In the moment I saw it as a failure to offer something that "normal" people do; in hindsight it was clear coercion. That clarity afterwards also amplifies how crushing it can feel.
NAH CAUSE I HAD THAT SAME EXPERIENCE!!! She had trauma of her own and I did too so I assumed she’d be understanding? But after we had some nice experiences together she started pressuring me sm cause we didn’t do things often enough. I started getting intoxicated so it was easier to engage w/ her.
It’s retraumatized me in multiple ways and it didn’t hit me until after. I’ve realized I’m Demisexual, but I also bounce between hyper sexual and sex averse depending on my mental state. Plus going on and off hormones messes w/ it. it’s nice to know I’m not alone or just overreacting. It’s hard.
But what sucks the most is that outside of the relationship she was great. She’s on the board of directors of a local indie queer community space and event venue and now I lost a whole community space. Cause I can’t go there without feeling unsafe due to proximity to her.
Man....I needed to hear this..I still do considering I'm still in contact but ugh...abuse like this always makes me feel like I'm never good enough or that I'll never get better no matter what I do.. thanks dude :')
last year I had an emotionally manipulative relationship with someone for only a week and I'm still fucked up by that to this day that shit sucks. I still don't think she did it because she was evil either, it's so much harder to spot than people think
She'd eat up all my free time because if I "ignored" her messages for more than five minutes she'd ask if I hated her and wanted to leave her and loudly exclaimed that her life was meaningless. She'd constantly imply that she hurt herself because of me too..
it sucks because I just wanted to help her, and constantly thought that I was the one betraying her trust or emotionally assaulting her. In the end she gaslighted me and tried to blame it on her plurality, I bought into it for a few days too before I realised what was happening.
💙yep, my ex. I don’t wanna get too far into it but they fucked me up. I’m just lucky that now I have others in my headspace to help me work through it and friends at the time to hold me up.
I was abused by my former father in that exact way for most of my life
Never physical until the last few years
Two years ago, literally a minute after leaving my cousin's funeral, both my mother and sister ganged up on me in the car, gaslighting me about it because "well, he told us he never did"
I have never seen better worded with Abusers. The last paragraph is also very true, from my experience the abusers were much less interesting once I left which I guess is normal. It’s hard to know your worth which is why people need more mutually supportive friends not yes men but genuine support
I'm smart enough to see when others are being abused and call it out but when it comes to myself I (used to) tend to put up with it because I thought I was loved. I've since moved on and am in a healthy relationship now
-its gonna depend on the exact kind of relationship and situation you have going on with the other person. but i like that people are being more open about it because it makes it more opening to people who are experiencing that to maybe start getting those resources they need to help
mm this is extremely true 👍 i think one of the things that happens that i see alot of people with this experience like just people don't tend to think it is what it is. it takes time to realize stuff like that and usually many outside resources. and emotional abuse varies on experience because
Comments
Mika? Fucking Die.
Never physical until the last few years
Two years ago, literally a minute after leaving my cousin's funeral, both my mother and sister ganged up on me in the car, gaslighting me about it because "well, he told us he never did"