Life under Trump is what I imagine the Cuban missile crisis felt like, if the Cuban missile crisis recurred every few days, and instead of being a standoff with the Soviet Union it was just JFK playing whac-a-mole with the launch button for kicks while Democrats in Congress cackled like banshees.
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We are all Charlie Brown, and MAGA higher-ups are Lucy with the football.
Lucy says the words, "RATIONAL GOVERNMENTAL FOOTBALL!" while cackling like a heroin witch.
MAGA Charlie goes for it. Lucy rugpulls.
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MAGA Charlie sees new football but cannot read and so assumes it is 1st football again. Lucy shoves new football into our collective rectum. Lucy proceeds to steal Charlie's shirt and eats it.
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MAGA Charlie asks where the football went.
Centrist Charlies want to talk Lucy down.
Other Charlies have other ideas.
Thank you for coming to my unhinged TED Talk.
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