Diagnosed with ADHD, and this is super relatable. The worst part is the guilt - you know you should do something, but despite trying, you just can't. - ThreadSky

brossentia.bsky.social • 60 days ago

Diagnosed with ADHD, and this is super relatable. The worst part is the guilt - you know you should do something, but despite trying, you just can't.

Reposted from Avi Henriques 🩸

Sorry to steal from Tumblr but this is so accurate it actually made me cry. The "paralysis of will" described here is the most painful symptom of my ADHD.

Comments

hotbot.bsky.social•60 days ago

It is too early in the morning to be called out like this...

dbkoopa166.bsky.social•59 days ago

I hate how accurate this is with me. Especially with the trash recently on my floor. >.<

rowyourbot.bsky.social•60 days ago

📌

rowyourbot.bsky.social•60 days ago

Gotta bookmark to remember. I am perplexed by this phenomenon in myself.

inaais.bsky.social•60 days ago

I suspect that I might have this, too and it's not entirely depression after all. If that's the case, I can fix myself accordingly, but it's been so difficult to focus lately. I plan to get an official diagnosis soon.

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

You can always try a few techniques to adapt for now - one that helped me some is "productive procrastination." Essentially, plan to get something done; if you can't do the main thing, you have to do something else productive.

And yeah, a diagnosis helped me a lot.

inaais.bsky.social•59 days ago

Can you offer some examples? :o

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

If I planned homework for a class but just couldn't get myself to do it, I'd switch to work for another class or do some cleaning around the house - as long as that homework wasn't urgent, I'd still be getting stuff done that needed done. That, or switch to practicing music/art/etc.

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

I learned to stop treating deadlines as taboo. You don't need to finish stuff early; you just need to finish them on time.

If someone hassles you about not finishing something early, just ask, "Do you want to move up the deadline?" Make them decide rather than making you guess.

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

(This is something I emphasized when teaching college - people should NOT be spending 50 hours on one of my papers. Work for the deadline for the rough draft, then work for the deadline of the final draft. If they did that, they'd be in good shape)

brossentia.bsky.social•60 days ago

Found another great explanation for ADHD paralysis

rowyourbot.bsky.social•60 days ago

Is that what my paralysis is? I have wondered about this paralysis.

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

Try some of the ideas online for how to get out of ADHD paralysis. If they work, great! If not, you might have something else going on.

Even if you don't have a diagnosis, you can still experiment with things to improve your life.

rowyourbot.bsky.social•59 days ago

Thanks, I will!

ramseyfox.bsky.social•60 days ago

It's so brutal. Been fired from 3 engineering jobs for this crap. Took me 30+ years to figure out that I needed a job with tiny micro tasks that I can't delay or put off

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

As much as I appreciate projects that run for months or years, most aren't for me - I'm much better at short bursts of productivity, then switching to something new.

meimeimeixie.purplepanda.gay•60 days ago

your internal voice screaming at you to DO THE THING while you sink deeper and deeper into the guilt and the self-hate

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

It's important to remember from time to time that it's not your fault - biology never had time to adapt to this hyper-capitalist, perfectionist world. That doesn't solve things, but alleviating some of the guilt goes a long way in helping you live a better life.

whatisamadillo.bsky.social•59 days ago

I lost count how many times I forgot about someone calling while I was alone at home. How many times I was confronted and given shit about having forgotten about relaying that information. How many times I forgot to simply write a note about it cause the moment they hang up, my brain resets. Fuck it

squidgirlatlarge.bsky.social•60 days ago

*Huh...*
So it's not just my laziness.
I'm just stunlocked by my brain and the fact that my body won't actually listen to me when I need to do something might just be that.
Fuuuuuck, another thing to try and talk to my psychiatrist and therapist about. this suuuuuucks.

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

But here's the deal: it's not your fault. We put a lot of hatred on ourselves when we can't do things, but doing that often makes things WORSE. Accepting that it's not your fault is HARD, but it helps you structure your life with a little more wiggle room.

gmbasil.pmd.social•59 days ago

I have said it before but I don't mind saying it again, but, I view ADHD as a prisoner of your own mind because of how much it prevents you from doing stuff you need/want to do. But it works well if you manage to be in your active hours

azziesky.bsky.social•60 days ago

Wondering if this is what I've been dealing with as someone with ADHD. I wanna do so much stuff throughout the day but it's like I'm stuck in stone.

I wanna get past it so bad.

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

I've had it pretty bad lately, too. Mental health needs change throughout life - not too surprising if previous coping strategies fail. Sometimes, it's helpful to just read a list of suggestions, try them out, and see if any help!

temporalwolf.bsky.social•59 days ago

I remember the last job interview I had nearly a decade ago now was at a call center. Hired me on the spot went through a whole tour of the place, etc. The first day on the job I was so paralyzed because I couldn't give enough of a fuck to get up. Needless to say I didn't go back.

temporalwolf.bsky.social•59 days ago

Like, just the thought of driving to the job, driving my car into a ditch sounded like a reasonable and desirable alternative. And that still haunts me.

desbay.bsky.social•60 days ago

So I may have ADHD but specifically attention deficiency?
Nahh, I just need that random thing that triggers a boost of motivation or a deadline pressure to actually move my butt to do work that I need to do that my brain keeps saying I need to do. Can't be adhd🙂
(I don't want to misdiagnose myself)

teyaric.bsky.social•60 days ago

Important But Not Urgent - the task isn't interesting or motivating, so it will sit there until it Becomes urgent. Sound familiar?

desbay.bsky.social•60 days ago

Yup, very.

ruuubs.bsky.social•60 days ago

You will say "It can't be ADHD" until you're staring at a deadline for something you fear will be the end of you if left incomplete, and STILL can't bring yourself to do it (or spend too long questioning if you have time for some parts)

desbay.bsky.social•60 days ago

I do that frequently😟

brossentia.bsky.social•60 days ago

I think it's fine to try and figure out a diagnosis for the purposes of talking to a doctor and getting officially diagnosed. But yeah, "hyperactive" is often less a physical thing, more mental

desbay.bsky.social•60 days ago

Yeah I should but in my country it hard to get a diagnosis🫠

brossentia.bsky.social•59 days ago

That's fair! With that said, there are a few helpful things to read online if you think you've got ADHD - they won't cure it, but they can help you a bit. I recommend reading about "productive procrastination;" it's essentially a way to get SOMETHING done

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