It's really messed up that we have to break these cycles bit atleast we learn the lessons I guess. Both a disservice by those before and a shaded gift in disguise.
I feel that, it used to take me 2 hours to clock in to my jobs before I started medicating heavy just to walk in so fucked up that I didn't care. Can't be doing all that like I used to now so I just gotta tank it.
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Like why does my mind have to be hyper aware and traumatized into doing this shit 😫
Especially in public, just going to the grocery store is a struggle.