So Sparky starts to shoot the force field and I'm not using hyperbole or metaphor here, a ghost shows up and slaps them each on the mouth, then knocks some rocks down into the cave. I have the rock hit count here: Sparky: 2 rocks Wesley: 0 rocks Picard: 477 rocks So Picard is dying. - ThreadSky

thesheepmafia.bsky.social • 13 days ago

So Sparky starts to shoot the force field and I'm not using hyperbole or metaphor here, a ghost shows up and slaps them each on the mouth, then knocks some rocks down into the cave. I have the rock hit count here:

Sparky: 2 rocks
Wesley: 0 rocks
Picard: 477 rocks

So Picard is dying.

Comments

thesheepmafia.bsky.social•13 days ago

Picard tells Wesley that he has to learn how to stand up to Sparky on his own. Sparky's actual name is Dirgo but everyone pronounces it like the slur for Italians and it's incredibly funny. Sparky and Wesley think about what to do for about five seconds and Sparky is done.

thesheepmafia.bsky.social•13 days ago

Their plan requires Wesley to be a brave gunslinger and so it fails catastrophically and now Sparky is encased in hardened ghost webbing. I don't know if this means he's dead, but he hasn't had his booze in like 26 minutes so he's already touch and go.

thesheepmafia.bsky.social•13 days ago

The Enterprise nearly fails to escape lethal radiation poisoning by like ten seconds. Nobody died but they all have a type of Turbo Cancer never before seen by man.

thesheepmafia.bsky.social•13 days ago

Wesley tells Picard that Sparky is dead. Picard is dying and I can assure you he wastes zero of his limited remaining energy pretending to be surprised that Wesley got Sparky killed. Wesley tries to monologue Picard out of dying from shock and blood loss. It goes... fine.

thesheepmafia.bsky.social•13 days ago

Wesley tells Picard that he's not going to die because he has thought his way through tougher situations than this. My guy, this isn't a riddle. His leg is shattered and his spleen is in his left pocket after being rocketed out of his asshole. He needs medical help, not positive vibes.

thesheepmafia.bsky.social•13 days ago

Wesley is trying to explain the nerdy way he may have found a solution to this problem and Picard tells him to stop. Presumably so Picard can tell him something sweet but I would have also told him to shut up and I have nothing sweet to say to him.

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