technically platonic jerking off is where a greek twink coats their buttcheeks in olive oil and an older philosopher slides their dick back and forth in the crack
like what if we go out shopping and we're in the changing room but you're so hard and can't try on the clothes until you take care of it,,, well don't worry! you're bestie is there to help :3
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We should do it platonically 0///0
(call that shit the greek handshake)