Yeah go on an ask all the ex-Mormon trad wives on TikTok trying to figure out how get grocery money after their "provider" ditched them just how it turned out for them
Comments
Log in with your Bluesky account to leave a comment
Funny, my dad, who was not exactly a vehement feminist, but a hardcore pragmatist in many respects, always said: “make sure of this kid, always have your own means of making money and your own bank account. Trust me”
These men warn THEIR women, while doing nothing to call out the culture that enables misogynist culture. They uphold the system while trying to cheat it.
Not dragging on your dad specifically, just these men in general
I see what you’re saying but I think the point is, we live in a capitalist society, and as long as we do, money equals power and choices. Don’t give that up for anyone. Have choices, always.
The number of women I've known with secret bank accounts because their mother, after learning the hard way, always told them to have an escape route ready.
Trad wives cannot be good mothers to daughters (or sons, but the girls will suffer the most).
Can we also talk about the inverse here as well? Being "a provider" is not a sufficiently fulfilling role in life. You absolutely WILL resent being everyone else's financial life support and the need to always be working for others.
It’s no news that many men resent providing financially. These same men demand that their wives perform all household maintenance, and claim that their wives do nothing.
But do remember that while a ‘provider’ is working a paid job, the woman is doing more work only unpaid, raising kids and taking care of everything. That labor has value and if it’s hired out men can’t afford it. Proving it’s got value
Very pretty = OnlyFans. Not so much = you're screwed, or, get busy and learn a skill now now now. Until I managed to make enough $$ to be a freelance writer full time, what saved me was typing plus word processing school. Also getting sexually harassed as cocktail waitress. That sucked tho...
Teach everyone to be as independent as they possibly can, within their capabilities! How to cook/budget/generally look after themselves. Where to get help IF they need it.
This. Every abled adult should be capable of taking care of themselves. Never out your wellbeing and safety entirely in someone else’s hands if you can help it. Way too much risk.
Provider could dump them, provider could die, provider could be jailed for some reason and these foolish women will be left with nothing.
Girls should always, ALWAYS have a back up plan.
My great grandmother was born around then and hated men (her husband was abusive). She ran a gas station while still married and then a diner for the railroad workers when she left him. She was living on her own up until her death in her 80s despite being in a wheelchair and on oxygen.
Provider could become disabled too. I’m so grateful to have a good career that pays the bills. If I didn’t, my disabled husband and I would be screwed.
Even if their husband is everything they've dreamed of, what if he dies? He MIGHT leave them money, but they won't have the skills or education to manage it or make more.
Even if your marriage is happy and lasting… you may outlive your spouse. You don’t want to be bereaved and having to figure this out any more than you want to be dumped and having to figure it out.
Bc the kids are the anchors by which they keep you chained. If you manage to leave, the new anchor for punishment, is financial.
The kids were never human to them.
This is sad. I grew up Mormon and for all the sexism Mormon women were encouraged to get an education. The evangelicals colonized Mormons culturally. (Please don’t think I’m defending Mormonism, I’m gay and I don’t have anything to do with the Church anymore).
I was under the impression that young women are strongly encouraged to go to college to find a husband in the first year, as a top priority. I wonder what the rate of non-return is for LDS woman at Brigham Young is.
Comments
These men warn THEIR women, while doing nothing to call out the culture that enables misogynist culture. They uphold the system while trying to cheat it.
Not dragging on your dad specifically, just these men in general
Trad wives cannot be good mothers to daughters (or sons, but the girls will suffer the most).
Yeah, patriarchy hurts men too.
It’s no news that many men resent providing financially. These same men demand that their wives perform all household maintenance, and claim that their wives do nothing.
Girls should always, ALWAYS have a back up plan.
“Housewives are one man away from welfare”
The kids were never human to them.
If the man dies, the woman and children have nothing.
Men who think this setup is ok don’t love their wives. They love having a slave and they don’t care what happens to them after they’re gone.