There was some military propaganda in my work safety training (because I'm American) and God modern soldiers look so fucking stupid. With their stupid helmet cameras and their stupid sunglasses. Might as well make their shoes say "here comes a special boy" with every step - ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

voicesbyzane.bsky.social • 27 days ago

There was some military propaganda in my work safety training (because I'm American) and God modern soldiers look so fucking stupid. With their stupid helmet cameras and their stupid sunglasses. Might as well make their shoes say "here comes a special boy" with every step

Comments

zaranerd.grimdorks.net•27 days ago

and yet the only thing covering the face is cloth. didnt knights figure this out

zaranerd.grimdorks.net•27 days ago

splashing a pail of water on the tactical team entering my home and fleeing in the chaos as their epic tactical masks waterboard them

voicesbyzane.bsky.social•27 days ago

Yeah but it's TACTICAL cloth with DIGITAL CAMO which looks LIKE ASS

zaranerd.grimdorks.net•27 days ago

i never understood digital camo. the whole point is to look natural right

thegreatbarbossa.bsky.social•27 days ago

why is he wearing wall-e on his head?

quilowisp.bsky.social•27 days ago

He is going to save private Eva

voicesbyzane.bsky.social•27 days ago

"There's too much fuckin shit on me i CANT BREATHE" ass armed forces

Comment image

voicesbyzane.bsky.social•27 days ago

5 years until the army signs a deal with some arms manufacturer that makes every us soldier wear a propeller on their helmet that spins and plays circus calliope music as they're domed by a Chinese sniper

voicesbyzane.bsky.social•27 days ago

God imagine dumping all this money into stupid tacticool future warrior bullshit that doesn't work but costs a fortune and you still lose to a bunch of locals armed with soviet surplus rifles hiding on cliffs the army is so fucking embarrassing. Fuck em. Piss on em.

windlass.bsky.social•27 days ago

Russia is a fuckin' pro at this. Some company gets subsidized to deliver shit like 'auto-turrets' and 'full body armor' and they produce like a shit prototype made on the cheap, pocket the rest of the money and then ask for more funding to finalize the project.

windlass.bsky.social•27 days ago

It's how you end up with shit-tech like the T-14 Armata which has never seen any combat usage, only 14 exist and they suffer constant mechanical failures despite eating up billions of dollars. Modern militaries are a fucking clown show half the time.

stoffeloni.bsky.social•27 days ago

I often think about that trillion dollar fighter jet that can't go too fast or it'll deglove itself, gives it's pilots the bends, and occasionally turns them into stew by not opening the cockpit for the ejector seat, and I believe it's main use to date has been to shoot down weather balloons

stoffeloni.bsky.social•27 days ago

powerful metaphor there, not quite sure for what though

sindrimyr.bsky.social•27 days ago

Tacticool kick me sign

angrytaco2.bsky.social•27 days ago

Now, c’mon, let’s be fair, the spinny propeller hat is camo patterned and the song is “Proud to be an American” as they’re domed by a Chinese sniper.

antiduck.bsky.social•27 days ago

G.U.N. is looking more exciting by the day :3

squidradio.bsky.social•27 days ago

As someone who used to be one of these dudes: Yes. Unironically, one of the biggest issues we heard back from deployments was that we had too much shit on for no reason. The weight of it all was a major discussion.

But it made people a lot of money! I'll get back to that.

squidradio.bsky.social•27 days ago

Later on we moved to smaller vest with lighter plates and easier donning that breathed better, but it's still a ton of crap to lug around.

It's a balancing act between a bunch of different factors, but the ACU days were legit terrible and sucked.

Comment image

squidradio.bsky.social•27 days ago

Also, another fun fact! The UCP Grey actually failed all of its testing trials during production. It even creates a 'isoluminance' effect, which makes it easier to see. Legit anti-camo.

It got selected because the general in charge of the trial retired to work at the production company. Capitalism!

Comment image

breakfield01.bsky.social•27 days ago

On a first glance I thought this dude was SLANGING

windlass.bsky.social•27 days ago

What's even more insane is how much of this shit actually *is* necessary because modern soldiers have to deal with so much wild ways to die that it's impossible to be on a modern battlefield without night vision and drone scrambling tech. Like, they look that stupid because they need to be lmao.

windlass.bsky.social•27 days ago

Anyway we should go back to this

Comment image

kmrst.bsky.social•27 days ago

I like all the dweeby shit hanging off of soldiers and, in fact, I think they should have more shit of dubious utility strapped to them.

Comment image

stoffeloni.bsky.social•27 days ago

more glasses make them see more gooder!

creatureau.bsky.social•27 days ago

But how can they function without night vision and a torch on their helmet in broad daylight? They need those to see through the sunglasses and goggles.

theotherhappyplace.bsky.social•27 days ago

He's wearing wall-e on his head

gamemakerm.bsky.social•27 days ago

His ass is getting ratatouilled by wall-e

bitwisebear.bsky.social•27 days ago

Needs more goggle

virtualdecay.bsky.social•27 days ago

Meanwhile, Ghana is getting strapped up like Tom Cruise in Edge of Tomorrow.

Comment image

arimaycry.bsky.social•27 days ago

america doesn't look like an actual country for me lol

chickenheart-sa.bsky.social•27 days ago

Anytime you see a troop decked out with extra soft armor inserts on their plate carrier and crud besides nods/lights stuck to their helmet, its 100% a publicity shot/someone enjoying their milsim fantasies. All that extra weight gets heavy, fast.

stote.bsky.social•27 days ago

I’m a “if it works it’s not stupid” guy but something went wrong aesthetically when they started incorporating headphones

Comment image

doompacifist.bsky.social•27 days ago

Big Johnny 5 energy here.