oh and in Grade 5 my teacher got upset with me for rolling my eyes at her. it was a reflex and frankly I wasn’t aware that I was doing it, but she was already chewing me out for it when I did it again and she flipped.
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another story, same teacher: one day I was bored and I happened to write THIS SUCKS with my finger in the dust on the computer printer. she found it and later brought it up in front of the whole class, demanding that the culprit come forward. because I am not an idiot, I did not confess.
she had already explained to us why saying something “sucked” was inappropriate, thereby introducing me to the concept of oral sex at the age of… 9 or 10?
by the way, all of these stories happened at private Christian schools. Jesus wept.
goes to show that even if you behave yourself 98% of the time, you still catch hell when you step out of line.
in retrospect I wish I’d made that connection earlier and stopped trying so hard to please the authority figures in my life, but it’s a hard habit to break.
I mean, everything trains you that the authority figures are good and have your best interest in mine and therefore you need to make the extra effort 100 percent of the time
And there’s no way a kid can know that isn’t true childhood is basically learning it isn’t
yeah. it took me a long time to really clue into it. because I knew about particularly egregious cases, like child abuse in the church, but had a harder time detecting it at lower levels in my own life. much clearer in hindsight.
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by the way, all of these stories happened at private Christian schools. Jesus wept.
in retrospect I wish I’d made that connection earlier and stopped trying so hard to please the authority figures in my life, but it’s a hard habit to break.
And there’s no way a kid can know that isn’t true childhood is basically learning it isn’t