lol not even. From my experience most of them weren't bi or pansexual... it was all about affectations of sophistication which not surprisingly felt very white too.
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Yeahhhhh I mean when intelligence is defined by a white, male society (assuming United States here) it's going to get wrapped up in racism and sexism. Like, as a high level concept, I get Sapiosexuality and think a decent amount of people are on some spectrum with it... But in practice? Ehhhhhhh 😬
idk, I don't really think it even stands as a higher concept when you think about it for a bit... to me it's just an attempt at legitimizing at best a kink with perceived sophistication and at worst lot of self-flattery and elitism, with sexuality terminology.
Eh, I mean I believe that demi-sexuality is real. I just think that people who couch it in those terms
1. Aren't necessarily demi-sexual
2. Are probably assholes
Even if you are sapiosexual, essentially saying "don't message me if you're stupid" isn't going to produce good results.
Demisexuality makes sense to me because it's by definition more subjective, and I don't think it belongs here. Sapiosexuality I think is just a very obnoxious term in itself that could much better be described as preferences for X specific features instead of something as broad as "intelligence"
Yeah I think for me the demisexual comparison makes more sense for what I was trying to get at than sapiosexuality. Cause, inherently, when you start talking about intelligence there's a ton of societal baggage that comes with it. And that societal baggage tends to be... Well racist, sexist, ablist
as someone with a learning disability i always interpreted the word as a way to be ablist and classist, quiet part loud style. the kind of person who can't imagine being friends with someone who doesnt have a degree. definitely overlaps with racism / sexism obv
I can see that and, to be fair, I think a lot of people view it AND use it that way. How I've seen it used by people close to me generally boils down to "I am attracted to people who engage with me on an intellectual level and have passion about something" which isn't really about intelligence imo
Haha yes. It's never just the brains, as it always became painfully obvious. Would be much more honest to admit they just have a thing for certain types, which is fine, but that wouldn't make them special.
Exactly! I was thinking about it and this was over 10 years ago, so grain of salt- but I recall many were not even very interested in what I had to say. It felt incredibly hollow. I guess when I first encountered the word I interpreted it as oh this person wants intelligent conversation but no
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1. Aren't necessarily demi-sexual
2. Are probably assholes
Even if you are sapiosexual, essentially saying "don't message me if you're stupid" isn't going to produce good results.