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abrahamjacobi.bsky.social
pediatrician • hospitalist • ML • bad at chess
66 posts 174 followers 254 following
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Imagine getting fired from your job as an attending hematologist for repeatedly refusing to do training modules and your family then finding out you go by “Papa Heme” on Twitter

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

me [bravely]: i actually prefer the multiple concussions i give myself to the CTE they cause.

submitted 25 days ago • 1 comment

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Doctor, a man named Scrabb Penis is in the waiting room for you. He says he has a non penis disease, but he is eating an apple with a knife and keeps reaching down his pants to scratch himself with it.

submitted 5 days ago • 4 comments

I’VE ABANDONED MY CHILD!!! I’VE ABANDONED MY BOY!!!

submitted 6 days ago • 14 comments

I think we can safely disregard the democratic party as any kind of influence or factor going forward. Helplessness in crisis is the best gift they can be handed, and they think they can milk it again as they have so many times. They need to be starved of donations and attention

submitted 12 days ago • 6 comments

Being a boomer horndog for BPD girlies on social is the default American sexuality, anything else is considered deviant at this point

submitted 13 days ago • 2 comments

Oh no my emails job company dropped their DEI initiatives as soon as it became a threat to their profits who could have seen that coming

submitted 23 days ago • 0 comments

Sir.....thank you.

submitted 24 days ago • 15 comments

[Guy with an emails job at a company that just successfully thwarted a union effort in its warehouse] ok y’all listen up this is how you fight the Cheeto with joy and love every day at work

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

dawg look at my independent media

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

“Loving your friends is resistance 🥰❤️”

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

Look I don't care if you're black, white, purple. You are seen. You are loved. Greens can fuck off to hell though

submitted 28 days ago • 9 comments

Lesser concern but I hope they don't bring back that fake corny appalachia posting where someone's like "real redneck folk respect pronouns, yall" and they're a software developer in Phoenix for a company that puts surplus mulch in school lunches.

submitted 28 days ago • 2 comments

more 👏 women of color 👏 pharma execs 👏

submitted 29 days ago • 1 comment

average American liberal arguing against mass deportations: “imagine no more tequila”

submitted 29 days ago • 1 comment

Joe brinden made stove illegal. That's why coffeee $100 a cup. It's mornging in america and I Help myself to a steaming mug of bullets

submitted 30 days ago • 11 comments

"Hi I'm a pediatric infectious disease specialist at the Hospital for Uninsured Waifs and we never have FoxNews On. I drive the Richard Scarry apple car and live in a boot"

submitted 32 days ago • 1 comment

dropping to my knees at target because someone sent me a YouTube link to the New Zealand rock wren’s mating ritual

submitted 33 days ago • 0 comments

Working for Deloitte is a brave act of resistance

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

Watching Dr. Fauci face a firing squad on Fox News in the physicians lounge. Between bites of stale bagel, a surgeon loudly complains that his daughter totaled her new jeep.

submitted 35 days ago • 8 comments

So bad. And for what? www.dropsitenews.com/p/kamala-har...

submitted 42 days ago • 14 comments

I'm suffering from Long Corvid (crow harasses me every time I leave the house)

submitted 43 days ago • 13 comments

Cyber truck got me feelin like Batman or halo

submitted 54 days ago • 2 comments

who up curing their gf’s diabetes with the insulin plant

submitted 54 days ago • 4 comments

You know, I don't think I've actually met somebody who got their masters in bioethics that seem to have an actual moral compass driving them, and I guess that explains why a person would seek out the type of guidance from an institutional certification program.

submitted 75 days ago • 2 comments

His commitment to the company was so great that he died quickly with no prolonged hospitalization to maximize shareholder profit

submitted 84 days ago • 4 comments

Leftist until personally inconvenienced

submitted 85 days ago • 3 comments

guy who’s in chiropractor school: “yeah I’m a grad student”

submitted 102 days ago • 0 comments

GloboGenCorp: the average lifetime cost of standard meds, nursing care, and hospitalizations for Condition X is $4,260,000—our revolutionary new drug completely cures Condition X with just one pill for only $4,250,000. That’s $50,000 in savings passed onto the customer. Bioethicist: sounds good! 👍

submitted 342 days ago • 2 comments