aherrera.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

Live by the sword. Drive by the sword. The sword is your neighbor. His dagger children playing on your lawn. Shredding your flowers. You say nothing because you are a coward.

submitted 4 hours ago • 0 comments

There's a Japanese killer bear movie called Remains: Beautiful Heroes (Yellow Fangs) where the bears MO is to kill women because periods drive him insane. www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjw2...

submitted 4 hours ago • 1 comment

My ventriloquist dummy, Pope Goblin IV, has a secret marionette daughter and he said he would straight up kill me if I told anyone, but I just don't give a shit anymore.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

My neighbors have started a podcast about how much I suck and I wish it wasn't so riveting and insightful. How the hell did they get Don Cheadle as a guest? Why does he hate me so much?

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

My neighbors have started a podcast about how much I suck and I wish it wasn't so riveting and insightful. How the hell did they get Don Cheadle as a guest? Why does he hate me so much?

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

My ventriloquist dummy, Pope Goblin IV, has a secret marionette daughter and he said he would straight up kill me if I told anyone, but I just don't give a shit anymore.

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

Youtube video was all Don't Eat The "Clean" Part Of Moldy Bread and I'm all like Fuck you, that's the best part of moldy bread.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Morrissey rips off his face and underneath is even more Morrissey.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

I keep all the e-mails I get from Pizza Hut in a file named Pizza_Hut_Mail.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

If you haven't seen them in a while soap operas are now just people covered in blood screaming about all the fun we'll have when we're dead.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

When buying tick poison at the feed store it's important to take a few minutes and go look at the baby rabbits to remind you there is more to life than death. Not for you, of course. You were born to rain murder on blood crabs in the Texas sun. So, get to work, boy.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Been thinking about it for a week and I've decided to head back to the park to find that raccoon that stole my hot dog and force him to make me a new hot dog.

submitted 257 days ago • 0 comments

The Great Wall of China is the only man-made structure that knows what outer space is.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

I keep dreaming about a western starring John Wayne where he plays a guitar to let this woman know that it's time to change his diaper.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Forgotten loser: This candy is terrible. Millionaire Genius: We'll call them Cough Drops.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

The fact that Michael Crichton was 6' 9'' makes him one of the greatest writers who ever lived. I don't have to read Kareem Abdul-Jabbar's books to know that they're great. 7'2". Dan Brown. 5'9". Trash. Case Closed.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

It's so fucking weird to me that I've played basketball.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

If nothing else, Return of The Living Dead was an important document of the 1980s Lexington Kentucky punk rock scene.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

I want to watch a Star Trek show that is only about the people who design and implement changes to Starfleet Uniforms.

submitted 3 days ago • 2 comments

I mean even if things hadn't worked out like they did, how healthy would Frankenstein's relationship with his monster have been anyway?

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Bugsy Malone seems like a movie someone had to make so that they could make the nightmares stop.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Just put out a platter, folks! Meat! Cheese! Vegetable! It doesn't matter when it's a platter!

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

It's hot out! Share The Gunslinger Roland Deschain and a lobstrosity at the beach

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

Germany made a sci-fi miniseries adaptation of Treasure Island in the 1980s. It features Anthony Quinn and Ernest Borgnine: www.youtube.com/watch?v=2f0E...

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

Listening to the Coast to Coast where a woman talks about her sexual encounters with a reptilian. She says she prefers sex with the creature to human men. All the lady callers are super into it; all the dude callers are pissed off.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

what do you mean 'normal tools'?

submitted 5 days ago • 73 comments

Complete Kagura Cultural Victory

submitted 5 days ago • 2 comments

“On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog” (unless you post like this, then it’s a total giveaway)

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

I'm always worried about finding a human finger in my food because I would probably eat it cuz I might not have that chance again.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Hamburger Helper was originally designed to be a beef golem that would murder your enemies and then you'd eat him to destroy the evidence of the crimes but through a series of focus groups the idea was eventually watered down to a box of noodles and a powder packet.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Spider-Man except it's just a regular spider with tiny Tobey Maguire heads at the ends of its legs that constantly say "ouch" as it walks.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

Every time I watch the Summer Of '69 music video I always forget that when Bryan Adams and his hooligan friends break into that weird apple storage place Bryan kicks the door off its hinges so I'm always like "Damn! He kicked that door off its hinges!"

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

I was using VR to play that new Mr. Bean simulator and I think I killed people.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

I hate how archaeologists and gravediggers have tricked us into thinking that digging has to have some sort of end game. Just dig, folks.

submitted 5 days ago • 5 comments

It's summertime guys so make sure that every night before you go to bed you get your lover to check your body for ticks and other parasites. And if you don't have a lover then you must suffer as the unattractive always suffer.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

The new ombudsman ran on a platform of Vape Blood Or Die and he has delivered on this promise in ways we could never have foreseen.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

It would be cool if Joel Coen was a regular guy but Ethan Coen was his ventriloquist dummy and we still had to call them the Coen brothers.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

A study of Unibrowed Men: Mordo from Return of the Blind Dead, Condo from the Doctor Who episode The Brain Of Morbius, and Jordy Verrill from Creepshow:

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

In fancy restaurants they're called Enchila-di-das.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments