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ananke.bsky.social
shitposting the pain away
186 posts 57 followers 60 following
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Posts 38 Comments 12

asking for the aux cord so that i can play Colleen Ballinger's "toxic gossip train"

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

acab includes cars

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

girl who thinks cunt and cunty means the same thing: ugh the president is bring so cunty again, i hate it

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

working out the muscles in my brain by reading up on debates on this app. i can really feel the neurons doing crunches by the time ive gotten to the 50th reply. by the 200th reply im breathing like ive done cardio

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

edging the microwave by opening the door when there's 1 second remaining and cancelling the timer

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

it must feel really good for the microwave when the timer hits 0 and it starts beeping

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

if canada is so scared of being invaded, why dont they have nuclear weapons? are they stupid?

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

waking up on international womens day and still seeing men outside, because of dei

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

wild that theres that many swimming medals at the olympics. they should do that for running too. i wanna see whos the fastest at hopping on one leg, crawling or rolling on the floor

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

family of four goes to restaurant, realizes there's a couple's special and start pretending like theyre on a double date

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

(explaining climate change to americans) imagine if you leave the burger on the stove for too long

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

(explaining capitalism to Americans) imagine if one person has all the burgers

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

(explaining communism to Americans) imagine if everyone have burgers

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

hallucinating a new reality because this one's too boring

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

cum that's color coded based on one's mood, call it cumeleon

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

i love the subway so much call me metrosexual

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

omg my costar telling me that my baggie of ket isn't lost!!!!

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

thats really cool bro, how many mental illnesses do you have?

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

shaking my head while listening to grimes so that god knows i disapprove of the artist

submitted 15 days ago • 0 comments

taking psychology classes to learn how to better gaslight gatekeep girlboss

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

inventing a plant thats mentally ill and only does photosynthesis ✨ when it feels like it ✨

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

the value of likes are tanking. yall need to ration how often u like posts otherwise were gonna have a posters economic crash

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

(thinking about how to introduce my followers to polyamory) do you guys like sharing?

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

small business owners foremost characteristics is that they're small

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

waking up in the morning, going into my mind closet to pick a personality

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

not breathing air for 10 seconds so that the air knows im extra mad at it

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

titanic was like 9/11 for boats

submitted 23 days ago • 1 comment

getting Alzheimer's is just like ur brain giving itself random k-holes as a treat

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

creating a diarrhea where ur ass becomes a vacuum and start siphoning in things

submitted 24 days ago • 0 comments

we've come so far as a society. instead of the olden days where one would change their profile pictures so that its overlaid by the flag of the country they support, one can now put them behind their username! the more flags the merrier!! 🇪🇨🇬🇫🇬🇦🇮🇷🇭🇳🇲🇺🇲🇨🇳🇪🇼🇫

submitted 25 days ago • 0 comments

does the bi in bipoc mean half poc or two poc?

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

sniffing flour just to feel something in my nose

submitted 42 days ago • 0 comments

sending skeets while playing gta v and drinking beer so that i can practice texting while drunk driving

submitted 49 days ago • 0 comments

going to a rave so i can meditate and mentally draft my future shitposts

submitted 54 days ago • 0 comments

my new thing is calling mental illnesses brain failures

submitted 55 days ago • 0 comments

calling cis people cissies (derogatory)

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

someone needs to invent a coffee that makes u constipated

submitted 63 days ago • 0 comments

going to a coffee shop to work and having to go home after an hr before the coffee gave me the shits

submitted 63 days ago • 0 comments