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apropoetic.bsky.social
22 posts 99 followers 91 following
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does anyone else constantly play out hypothetical scenarios in their head and then get extremely depressed over things that haven't even happened yet?

things just keep getting worse for me and my family and they were bad to begin with. i just want it all to be over at this point. even just the thought of it often gives me this feeling of relief like a crushing weight has been lifted off of me.

every day is another day the majority of society and especially content creators (even those who talk about helping others or how much they love their fans/communities) remind me that i have absolutely no value as a human because i dont have any money.

im so ashamed of myself.

I don't want anyone to ever tell me they care ever again. No you don't. I know I'm not worth caring about so you don't need to lie to my face and then just ignore me from then on after saying it. I don't have any hope as is so I certainly don't need false hopes.

TIL you can only be a fan of someone if you give them money.

god im so stressed out. medicare/medicaid fucked my insurance all to hell & i have to figure that out. my health is getting even more fucked & my doc wants me to see more specialists. also getting surgery on both hands & elbows for nerve & tendon release starting next month...

feels like nothing in my life has any meaning because theres no one to share it with or even tell it to, not even online. every time i post or think about posting something im just like wait... nevermind. even if something good happened for once it just seems like it would feel like an empty gesture