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astrophic.bsky.social
AuDHD. Sometimes I write. Can tie own shoelaces 9 times out of 10 🏳️‍🌈 🇵🇸 They/them Alt text: Cover photo: unicorn on hind legs surrounded by stars silhouetted against rainbow Profile picture: drawing of a black and white kitten on shoulder
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Hunting for time capsules on Subnautica- twitch.tv/acwells

Coral Island mentioned on Jeopardy Pop Culture!

Hinge is like 'We pick the most compatible people for you' and then it's like 'We think you'll love this gym buff carhead gay monogamous dad of three' or 'How about this club-loving, frequent travelling monogamous straight woman with two kids'

I'm reading Midnight Sun again and somehow the first read through I missed entirely that the reason Edward creeps into her bedroom to watch her sleep is... to protect her from meteorites. I love these ridiculous books so much I cant even

I don't know why people find this confusing

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha THIS is the bad place

🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼

one day soon AI will be able to enjoy jacking off and playing video games for you, freeing up your valuable time to toil in the blood mines for shelter-creds

I PICKLED

Apparently there's a new Captain America film out so to celebrate I am watching the best of all the Marvel films, Shang Chi

BREAKING: Devil confirms new circle of hell has been established to house inventor of partially-attached bottlecaps. "We knew it was a special case and wanted to ensure a truly customised experience for them" said Morningstar, 2575 (estimate, exact age in question)

I don't get this 'smashed patty' thing. Gimme a big fat juicy patty seven days a week

You can tell Edward was a virgin because when Bella is covered in bruises after they have sex he's all 'OH MY GOD I'M A MONSTER' instead of being like 'Was it good for you because we proper got carried away'

This is so funny to me. Also relatable pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC...

Check yourself before you wreck yourself

I'm about to get to the bite bit in Twilight with the mumble song and I'm already laughing it's not even started yet

Tunic is hands down one of the best games I've played in the last twenty years.

In the WK discord, a bunch of people kept talking about which Pokémon they wanted to fuck, so a mod locked them all in a quarantine zone and they can’t get out until they finish a tier list of the Pokémon they want to fuck the most and I’ve been cry laughing all night watching them

SCHOOL SPIRITS IS BACK ON PARAMOUNT PLUS THIS IS NOT A DRILL GO AND WATCH IT IMMEDIATELY IT IS GOOD ENOUGH TO WARRANT THIS ALL CAPS APB THANK YOU