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bacardioakheart.bsky.social
A husband, a father, a philosopher, a music lover, a bell end. Your one stop shop for the destruction of mainstream thought.
574 posts 333 followers 188 following
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Important advice I'm sure you'll agree.

submitted 2 hours ago • 1 comment

Had a quiet International Women's Day this year. Just close family & a small turkey joint. Not the same once the kids have grown up.

submitted 21 hours ago • 1 comment

*NEW HAT KLAXON*

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

I'm fascinated by this worn carpet tile. Looks like a dropped pancake.

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

Starting today with Percy 'Thrills' Thrillington's orchestral cover of Paul McCartney's Ram album. Some say Paul was directly involved, but It's more likely it was an actual man sheep with a talent for orchestration.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

It's so cool when people you like on the old place follow you back on here. Gives you a nice glow.

submitted 1 day ago • 2 comments

Have you ever had one of those days where you just get on your own nerves & by the end of the day you just think you're a twat? Well I have.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

I'd pay to avoid a corporate away day. #TheApprentice

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

My wife is currently watching the last 20 minutes of every programme she fell asleep watching this week.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

They just played Cliff Richard's We Don't Talk Anymore on the radio & I realised Cliff must have hired a backing singer just to sing the word 'Sheep' on it.

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Just been sent an email with the term 'hereunder' in it.

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

BREAKING: Rod Stewart to headline this year's Glastonbury.

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

Saw this kid going to school for World Book Day dressed as Boris Johnson's autobiography.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Just reversed into a tree.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Who would you most love to go bankrupt? I'd choose Elon Musk. Then Cycling Mikey.

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

I gave up optimism for Lent in 2004 & never went back to it.

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

Somedays your moustache just doesn't play ball. You know what I mean, right ladies?

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

Just had one of those poos that make you feel half a stone lighter & what's even better is I did it in works time.

submitted 5 days ago • 2 comments

Me, judging everyone's red carpet looks tonight.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Actors are very self-congratulatory aren't they? I've been pretending I enjoy my job & like my bosses for years, but I've never been given an award.

submitted 6 days ago • 2 comments

Monday.

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

"WITHOUT ME YOU HAVE NO CARDS"

submitted 6 days ago • 0 comments

Lovely Spring walk in the sunshine.

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

Enhance a TV title by changing a word to "fuck" One Fuck In The Grave.

submitted 8 days ago • 89 comments

Enhance a TV title by changing a word to "fuck" Fuck Or No Deal.

submitted 8 days ago • 44 comments

Love this tree. Always makes me think someone's diving off it.

submitted 8 days ago • 1 comment

President Zelenskyy gets an unfavourable response when suggesting that watching his Mrs. Brown's Boys boxset would ease the tensions in the room.

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

"You don't look grateful"

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

"David? It's Mummy Pig. I'm pregnant. With YOUR baby"

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

I missed this part

submitted 8 days ago • 386 comments

"WHY AREN'T YOU WEARING A SUIT?"

submitted 8 days ago • 0 comments

"Milk, milk, lemonade. Around the corner, chocolates made"

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

"You can't get quicker, than a Quik Fit fitter"

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

"Pee is stored in the balls"

submitted 9 days ago • 0 comments

"And as a gesture of the relationship between our two countries, I'd like to present you with tickets to the Willy Wonka Experience in Glasgow. I'd ignore the reviews if I were you"

submitted 9 days ago • 1 comment