brokenlizard.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

I’m very pleased with this photo

submitted 12 minutes ago • 0 comments

Today I’ve seen cat videos and an old man pushing a walker down a 5-lane roadway. It’s like god is toying with us.

submitted 1 hour ago • 1 comment

I feel like if someone sat with me in my sadness and genuinely asked “Are you okay? What’s going on? You can talk to me, I’m here for you” I’d immediately burst into tears

submitted 1 hour ago • 0 comments

Funny how the same boss who demands a doctors note (only as a punishment for being sick) also thinks need to walk to refill a prescription is a joke. Now taking suggestions on how to be the evilest employee.

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

submitted 3 hours ago • 0 comments

I might be a mean person at times but I WILL warn migrants in the gas-station bathroom of police presence outside. ICE is watching 1000% but fuck ICE

submitted 16 hours ago • 0 comments

Tim Curry, but with a gun

submitted 20 hours ago • 0 comments

I’m ~1min in and, uhh — holy shit, Bitchin’ by the Dozen? Our grandfather of comedy is shredding blisters 🤘

submitted 1 day ago • 1 comment

no.378 on the list of things I’ve texted people without prompt or reason

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

If I’m not dancing in the moon light; if everyone isn’t feeling warm and bright; if it’s no fine or natural sight — what are we even doing here? Not dancing in the moonlight? Are you kidding me? I’m going home. Y’all are jerks and meanies.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

This is your daily reminder that YT people commit more crime than any variation of immigrant

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

Of course Bitch BcBonnell only steps down under an administration that practically ensures he is replaced by an even bigger psychopath.

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

Update: I never told her and she still doesn’t know. No one help her.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Don’t wake me up, I hate my life

submitted 3 days ago • 1 comment

I want to snatch the faces off these people, don’t stand in the way of me and my anti-depressants

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

I know I’ve been talking a big game on what to do with this money coming in but what if I just get a bitchin set of veneers and start biting people

submitted 4 days ago • 2 comments

If I were a felon I couldn’t work at McDonalds. All of his constituents and himself are, in fact, pigs in trench-coats

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Wild how my ex-cop parent abused and abuses me but still has the balls to say ACAB

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

I swear to god nothing will get better and the world will watch me rot as just another person enslaved, another person without a chance, & when I resist it may very well ruin my pathetic life through remedial fees, fines, and cost But that’s okay because someday everyone will remember I was pretty

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

If they’re booing they’re boolin’, the only upstairs neighbor we like out here

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

It would really suck if we all downloaded TextNow, got a new number every month for inactivity, and let the debt-collectors crash out. Also, a useful tool to prank-call former employers.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Once a week I wake up and triumphantly scream “DES-PA-CITO”

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

They didn’t have to animate the teeth on Osmosis Jones like that

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

These YouTube ads have officially given me cancer [an actual ad, not even kidding]

submitted 4 days ago • 1 comment

I’m very pleased with this photo

Today I’ve seen cat videos and an old man pushing a walker down a 5-lane roadway. It’s like god is toying with us.

I feel like if someone sat with me in my sadness and genuinely asked “Are you okay? What’s going on? You can talk to me, I’m here for you” I’d immediately burst into tears

Funny how the same boss who demands a doctors note (only as a punishment for being sick) also thinks need to walk to refill a prescription is a joke. Now taking suggestions on how to be the evilest employee.

I might be a mean person at times but I WILL warn migrants in the gas-station bathroom of police presence outside. ICE is watching 1000% but fuck ICE

Tim Curry, but with a gun

I’m ~1min in and, uhh — holy shit, Bitchin’ by the Dozen? Our grandfather of comedy is shredding blisters 🤘

no.378 on the list of things I’ve texted people without prompt or reason

If I’m not dancing in the moon light; if everyone isn’t feeling warm and bright; if it’s no fine or natural sight — what are we even doing here? Not dancing in the moonlight? Are you kidding me? I’m going home. Y’all are jerks and meanies.

This is your daily reminder that YT people commit more crime than any variation of immigrant

Of course Bitch BcBonnell only steps down under an administration that practically ensures he is replaced by an even bigger psychopath.

Update: I never told her and she still doesn’t know. No one help her.

Don’t wake me up, I hate my life

I want to snatch the faces off these people, don’t stand in the way of me and my anti-depressants

I know I’ve been talking a big game on what to do with this money coming in but what if I just get a bitchin set of veneers and start biting people

If I were a felon I couldn’t work at McDonalds. All of his constituents and himself are, in fact, pigs in trench-coats

Wild how my ex-cop parent abused and abuses me but still has the balls to say ACAB

I swear to god nothing will get better and the world will watch me rot as just another person enslaved, another person without a chance, & when I resist it may very well ruin my pathetic life through remedial fees, fines, and cost But that’s okay because someday everyone will remember I was pretty

If they’re booing they’re boolin’, the only upstairs neighbor we like out here

It would really suck if we all downloaded TextNow, got a new number every month for inactivity, and let the debt-collectors crash out. Also, a useful tool to prank-call former employers.

Once a week I wake up and triumphantly scream “DES-PA-CITO”

They didn’t have to animate the teeth on Osmosis Jones like that

These YouTube ads have officially given me cancer [an actual ad, not even kidding]

Ladies, gentlemen, & mixters; I’d like to introduce my favorite BlueSky account so far @snithappens.bsky.social

Actual footage of my pretentious ass wearing any black sweater with my glasses

If I’m gonna frown as soon as I wake up, I’m taking yall with me

He. WHAT. 🤢