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carnitas.bsky.social
Chaotic Sleepy Miss America’s Weird Neighbor 👑 2025 📍a bog perhaps
3,922 posts 1,102 followers 334 following
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Posts 25 Comments 25

Cutting out the middle man by adding tums to my chili

submitted 5 hours ago • 0 comments

He's a 10 but calls candle scents "flavors"

submitted 20 hours ago • 12 comments

I eat a lot of lollipops for someone who starts stick end first.

submitted 1 hour ago • 1 comment

i believe in facts, science and reason and i will NEVER stop drinking gasoline

submitted 3 hours ago • 0 comments

Don’t forget the “don’t forget the balls” emoji 🫴

submitted 6 hours ago • 2 comments

It’s fine if you don’t like me but you’re gonna have to explain to yourself why you hate joy and whimsy so much

submitted 7 hours ago • 1 comment

Shitposting is an extreme sport

submitted 7 hours ago • 1 comment

"Reply with the 3 picture saved on your ph-" i make porn, dude

submitted 8 hours ago • 5 comments

Okie dokie Okay donkey 🤝 Autocorrect

submitted 7 hours ago • 2 comments

Saw ur beau get carted off to the sheriff’s office for trying to unhitch a horse that wasn’t his. How embarrassing for u.

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

on this #ThrobbingThursday we guess if it's a migraine or a stubbed toe

submitted 7 hours ago • 1 comment

When Ariana Grande said “I’m so fuckin grateful for my ex” literally nobody felt that

submitted 7 hours ago • 1 comment

When Kurt Cobain said “Come” I felt that

submitted 7 hours ago • 0 comments

"say no to drugs" bitch nobody is offering

submitted 9 hours ago • 3 comments

Will the Kiss Army be mad that I also joined Ollie’s Army?

submitted 8 hours ago • 2 comments

If you think I’m cute now wait til you see me ping pong betwixt my kitchen and dining room because I completely forgot what I was dong or why I came in here did I need something? Maybe going in the other room and coming back in will help. Oh look at you, weed.

submitted 8 hours ago • 1 comment

Every time I’ve said “I’m sorry to disturb you,” has been a lie.

submitted 10 hours ago • 2 comments

Quick note to my newest followers. I’m sorry. It isn’t going to get better.

submitted 19 hours ago • 2 comments

My next marriage will be for money but stay tuned for the third, that one’s gonna be purely for comedy

submitted 9 hours ago • 2 comments

Fun fact about Pittsburgh & our many rivers: bullets cannot kill you if you’ve swam in the Mon.

submitted 9 hours ago • 0 comments

Life gets a whole lot easier when you ride the chaos like a trusty steed instead of fighting it like an untrusty steed.

submitted 9 hours ago • 0 comments

Me at the kids table teaching them how to tape a nickel to a piece of string so they can save you money on parking

submitted 9 hours ago • 0 comments

Game of Thrones used to be so good

submitted 9 hours ago • 3 comments

mfw I’m about to tell the tiktok kid recording me how to make explosives

submitted 10 hours ago • 0 comments

Going to make a discord server called CruSky and I will never stop posting

submitted 10 hours ago • 0 comments