craigpsutton.bsky.social - Profile | ThreadSky | a Reddit-style client for Bluesky

craigpsutton.bsky.social

Opinions are not my own. Send help! Just tryna be a silly billy. I do stand-up, improv, sketch, and I'm a professional game designer. My bangers feed: https://tinyurl.com/nm3kyaav My sketches here: https://youtube.com/@teamlaundry?si=ZWIzuYFi5jM7V7_T

3,682 posts 4,040 followers 1,017 following

Posts 40 Comments 10

It feel like California is just taunting the guy now. Dude's so predictable, like a cartoon villain. Someone give him a bigmac with a lit stick of dynamite sticking out and he'd take a bite.

submitted 2 hours ago • 0 comments

Do you think the pope picks his nose in the popemobile?

submitted 10 hours ago • 1 comment

Having a bug-out bag is a great idea unless you're trying to store insects.

submitted 18 days ago • 1 comment

Oh hi there. It looks like you've caught me in medias res.

submitted 10 hours ago • 0 comments

I'm trying to have healthier nutrition habits so now the only candy I sneak into the movies is gummy vitamins.

submitted 5 days ago • 2 comments

This year for Father's Day, I'm getting my dad 44 wallets. One for every year he's been a father.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

Folks, iron your flags on low heat. They all creased n shit. Disrespectful.

submitted 1 day ago • 3 comments

It may seem prudish of me to break off my engagement after my ex-fiancé had a stripper at her bachelorette party, but I cannot abide a partner who thinks it’s ok to fantasize like that about a police officer

submitted 1 day ago • 9 comments

Are you supposed to brush your retainer once a day? Or after every meal?

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

Geek Squad is too expensive. I had to use the generic brand, the Intelligent Yet Socially Awkward Group.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

LITERARY TIP: "allegory" means "a story that reminds you of al gore"

submitted 2 days ago • 13 comments

He's a tin, but if he only had a heart

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

Cash, grass, and ass: welcome to the weed orgy onlyfans van

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

my grandpa was illiterate so i have no idea if this ouija board is working or not

submitted 2 days ago • 20 comments

Scammer called me today. Joke’s on them, I scammed them out of a nice little conversation. All they got was my bank password.

submitted 2 days ago • 22 comments

who has two thumbs and got them both stuck in la croix cans?? this guy - sent with voice to text

submitted 2 days ago • 2 comments

"matching donations" is such a nasty idea. rich guy stands next to a homeless guy on the street and says "i won't give him a dollar unless you do"

submitted 2 days ago • 3 comments

Throwing a heavy flat circular object should not be an Olympic competition. Discuss.

submitted 7 days ago • 7 comments

So broke I buy groceries at Half Foods.

submitted 3 days ago • 4 comments

Later: "Strike two and a half..."

submitted 2 days ago • 1 comment

The federal threats going on in America are precisely the things our forefathers on Andor warned us about. Study Disney+ or be doomed to repeat it.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Geek Squad is too expensive. I had to use the generic brand, the Intelligent Yet Socially Awkward Group.

submitted 2 days ago • 0 comments

The federal threats going on in America are precisely the things our forefathers on Andor warned us about. Study Disney+ or be doomed to repeat it.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

This year for Father's Day, I'm getting my dad 44 wallets. One for every year he's been a father.

submitted 4 days ago • 0 comments

I've been seeing lots of great info online about how to deal with police tactics as a protester. Do cops get similar training? "Protestors might employ sonic weaponry such as using their voices to appeal to your humanity. Simply shoot rubber bullets at them."

submitted 5 days ago • 1 comment

2 Farm 2 Table

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

I'm trying to have healthier nutrition habits so now the only candy I sneak into the movies is gummy vitamins.

submitted 5 days ago • 2 comments

Who's going to stop him this time? We've already shown him there's no consequences. He's installing loyalists in every department. He's openly bribable. Big tech has fully capitulated to him. And his VP isn't going to suddenly get a conscience this time. We're all that's left. America, this is you.

submitted 134 days ago • 2 comments

My sperm count is so low that I could only give seman sample

submitted 141 days ago • 2 comments

Throwing a heavy flat circular object should not be an Olympic competition. Discuss.

submitted 7 days ago • 7 comments

get down with the sickness 🤙 tubular is the gift that has been given to me

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

It's time for America's favorite gameshow: Who's That One Guy From The Thing!!

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

before playing tennis one has to master one thru ninenis

submitted 7 days ago • 11 comments

4:50 california on time blaze it

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

4:23 blaze it sorry traffic was nuts

submitted 7 days ago • 1 comment

In honor of their DEI rollbacks, Target Corporation is celebrating this year's Pride Month by renaming their men's clothing line from Goodfellow to Proudboy.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

In honor of their DEI rollbacks, Target Corporation is celebrating this year's Pride Month by renaming their men's clothing line from Goodfellow to Proudboy.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

It feel like California is just taunting the guy now. Dude's so predictable, like a cartoon villain. Someone give him a bigmac with a lit stick of dynamite sticking out and he'd take a bite.

Do you think the pope picks his nose in the popemobile?

Having a bug-out bag is a great idea unless you're trying to store insects.

Oh hi there. It looks like you've caught me in medias res.

I'm trying to have healthier nutrition habits so now the only candy I sneak into the movies is gummy vitamins.

This year for Father's Day, I'm getting my dad 44 wallets. One for every year he's been a father.

Folks, iron your flags on low heat. They all creased n shit. Disrespectful.

It may seem prudish of me to break off my engagement after my ex-fiancé had a stripper at her bachelorette party, but I cannot abide a partner who thinks it’s ok to fantasize like that about a police officer

Are you supposed to brush your retainer once a day? Or after every meal?

Geek Squad is too expensive. I had to use the generic brand, the Intelligent Yet Socially Awkward Group.

LITERARY TIP: "allegory" means "a story that reminds you of al gore"

He's a tin, but if he only had a heart

Cash, grass, and ass: welcome to the weed orgy onlyfans van

my grandpa was illiterate so i have no idea if this ouija board is working or not

Scammer called me today. Joke’s on them, I scammed them out of a nice little conversation. All they got was my bank password.

who has two thumbs and got them both stuck in la croix cans?? this guy - sent with voice to text

"matching donations" is such a nasty idea. rich guy stands next to a homeless guy on the street and says "i won't give him a dollar unless you do"

Throwing a heavy flat circular object should not be an Olympic competition. Discuss.

So broke I buy groceries at Half Foods.

Later: "Strike two and a half..."

The federal threats going on in America are precisely the things our forefathers on Andor warned us about. Study Disney+ or be doomed to repeat it.

Geek Squad is too expensive. I had to use the generic brand, the Intelligent Yet Socially Awkward Group.

The federal threats going on in America are precisely the things our forefathers on Andor warned us about. Study Disney+ or be doomed to repeat it.

This year for Father's Day, I'm getting my dad 44 wallets. One for every year he's been a father.

I've been seeing lots of great info online about how to deal with police tactics as a protester. Do cops get similar training? "Protestors might employ sonic weaponry such as using their voices to appeal to your humanity. Simply shoot rubber bullets at them."

2 Farm 2 Table

I'm trying to have healthier nutrition habits so now the only candy I sneak into the movies is gummy vitamins.

Who's going to stop him this time? We've already shown him there's no consequences. He's installing loyalists in every department. He's openly bribable. Big tech has fully capitulated to him. And his VP isn't going to suddenly get a conscience this time. We're all that's left. America, this is you.

My sperm count is so low that I could only give seman sample

Throwing a heavy flat circular object should not be an Olympic competition. Discuss.

get down with the sickness 🤙 tubular is the gift that has been given to me

It's time for America's favorite gameshow: Who's That One Guy From The Thing!!

before playing tennis one has to master one thru ninenis

4:50 california on time blaze it

4:23 blaze it sorry traffic was nuts

In honor of their DEI rollbacks, Target Corporation is celebrating this year's Pride Month by renaming their men's clothing line from Goodfellow to Proudboy.

In honor of their DEI rollbacks, Target Corporation is celebrating this year's Pride Month by renaming their men's clothing line from Goodfellow to Proudboy.

We didn't know how good we had it. If I could go back I'd never leave Cactus Jack's Arcade and Pool.

Oh hi there. It looks like you've just joined me in medias res.

Oh hi there. It looks like you've just joined me in medias res.