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dukelemoyne.bsky.social
Umm...
30 posts 3 followers 8 following
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Posts 38 Comments 12

I've never had an overt interest in guns, but I foresee the need to protect us from the ones who voted this bullshit into our lives.

submitted 18 hours ago • 0 comments

Trump is a pathological fuck. Vance is a bitch. I hope I live to see them wail.

submitted 18 hours ago • 0 comments

You voted for him. Fuck you.

submitted 18 hours ago • 0 comments

Stole a candy striper's stethoscope and listened to my stomach. Our guts sound like a slippery factory. Not recommended.

submitted 20 hours ago • 0 comments

For the love of all that is not Musk, get yer shit bought and shut that shit down by 12:00 am, Feb 28.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

The spiritual hero of my youth was Father Frank Scott, as portrayed by the cooler-than-hell Gene Hackman.

submitted 1 day ago • 0 comments

* Pundit with Telecaster on his wall outlines budget problems* Me: His action is too high.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Life is replete with suffering; it is unavoidable. But so much NEEDLESS suffering could be alleviated, at no hardship to the people holding the purse strings. Human beings are fascinating.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Words I survive by: "I laugh that I may not cry." - some TV doctor in the 1980s

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

From now on, prehistory will be taught as "Back in the Flintstones' Days."

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

I dunno if it's just me, but I seem to vacillate between jaw-dropping wonder at the glory of creation, and gut-wrenching disappointment with our role in it.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

Blend English and foreign words to create your own importmanteaus.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

This is the time for serious people with serious concerns and no time for jokes to please vacate the internet. Things about to get bull-goose crazy here.

submitted 5 days ago • 0 comments

@kris-ten-z.bsky.social It's just me, Roger Arnold. Marilyn has not migrated...yet.

submitted 13 days ago • 1 comment

most sharks never stop swimming because they are haunted by past mistakes and if they pause for even a moment grief will overwhelm them

submitted 30 days ago • 24 comments

we are all so lucky to be alive and to be so miserable. cherish every wretched moment my friends

submitted 30 days ago • 3 comments

Mama Bear: Ok but last time Papa Bear: Thanks, babe [she puts on a Goldilocks wig] Mama Bear:I can't sleep here. It's toooo hard

submitted 30 days ago • 16 comments

Oh wow, Dr Doolittle could talk to animals? Big deal, so can I [sees a dog walking down the street] hey what's up chief

submitted 30 days ago • 5 comments

roses are red grandmas love bingo the neighbors are stuffy their yard needs a flamingo

submitted 30 days ago • 3 comments

I'm the only one actually printing out my posts and nailing them to the center of town.

submitted 29 days ago • 3 comments

Gosh, I remember when we had an actual president instead of a loudmouth bully who won't take responsibility for his actions.

submitted 29 days ago • 3016 comments

ripped jeans are fun until your thighs are bustin’ out when you sit down

submitted 29 days ago • 8 comments

@maryasummers.bsky.social Hi, lady. It's Roger Arnold from Facebook. Duke Lemoyne is my Blues alias. FYI, bc I use it all over sm.

submitted 31 days ago • 0 comments

It’s Monday. This was the day Henry Kissinger and I would pull on our racquetball gear, pile in Lincoln, and play one game before heading straight to Bennigan’s for all-you-can-eat shrimp. They weren’t even open. We’d find it in the dumpsters out back. But it was an adventure. I miss my best friend.

submitted 75 days ago • 6 comments

In all my years of living in New York City, I’ve learned nothing can stop this town except for a light drizzle.

submitted 74 days ago • 5 comments

‘Tis the season to wrap objects in colorful paper with the fine motor skills of an inebriated T-rex.

submitted 74 days ago • 12 comments

Just took a dump without my phone to get a better sense of how Abraham Lincoln lived.

submitted 74 days ago • 20 comments

Immortality sounds like the worst thing ever.

submitted 74 days ago • 17 comments

Saw a young woman on the train today carrying her iPhone without a case and stuffed into the back pocket of her jeans. Not even a Navy SEAL walks around with this kind of confidence.

submitted 73 days ago • 6 comments

it’s friday the 13th so go wash your butt for good luck

submitted 78 days ago • 9 comments

When I was about 3-4, my grandma got new curtains & to deal with what I felt was a major life disruption, I stopped using the bathroom & then stopped eating/drinking to keep from going, so nothing went in & nothing came out for a couple days. This is my origin story.

submitted 77 days ago • 2 comments

Edward Scissorhands: this sucks Gary Dildofeet: oh BOO HOO

submitted 76 days ago • 7 comments

White Christmas playing, and I am whelmed by the dissonance. Angry.

submitted 76 days ago • 3 comments

Went to the dentist today and promised him I would do a better job flossing. Hahahaha. I live in a house of lies.

submitted 81 days ago • 7 comments

Yeah, I live dangerously. I’m eating tomato soup while wearing a white shirt.

submitted 81 days ago • 1 comment

i have a lot of yellow in my life for someone whose favorite color is not yellow

submitted 80 days ago • 9 comments

I keep coming home, thinking I’ll walk in and find Henry Kissinger there in his boxers, drunk, covered in mayonnaise and watching “Perfect Strangers” like he always did. But angels don’t just fall from the sky. Cherish your loved ones.

submitted 79 days ago • 4 comments