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emiroot.bsky.social
Book nerd, wannabe writer, mom, complete and utter disaster.
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My husbandjust sang a little ditty about his anxiety, and then said, "Bit of an expositional crisis there," paused, then said, "well, not wrong, but just happened to be right," before correcting to existential crisis. And now we are laughing over "expositional crisis".

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

Taylor Swift- $10 million Selena Gomez- $5 million Beyoncé- $2.5 million The richest man in the WORLD- $0

submitted 41 days ago • 665 comments

This! h/t @littlemissvrb.bsky.social

submitted 41 days ago • 112 comments

Someone please help me decide the best, most appropriate level of petty response for when someone parks nose to nose with you in a parking lot and the LEAVES THEIR EFFING HEADLIGHTS ON! Flashing my own lights at them didn't get the point across, and all I wanted was to eat my TacoBell in peace.

submitted 55 days ago • 1 comment

Wake tf up!

submitted 57 days ago • 1 comment

Mutation should be considered a given! Look around sometimes and see what people do, without a care in the world. I don't think the lesson was learned from COVID. What is wrong with people who refuse to learn? I'm going back to MY Bible scripture.

submitted 57 days ago • 0 comments

Annual reminder that The Best Little Whore House in Texas is a Christmas movie.

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

It's Christmas eve. I wrapped all the kids presents, the kids and I wrapped my husbands, but here I sit staring at three Amazon bags that I know contain my gifts. Husband knows what the bag are, I told the kids when they asked, no one has made an effort to wrap my gifts.

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

Last week a customer insisted I tell her what to get me for Christmas. "A 10 dollar giftcard to the pizza shop would be great, so I can grab one for the kids when I work late." Apparently she shared the info, because today I got 3 giftcards on her street to the pizza place! I am so grateful.

submitted 64 days ago • 0 comments

Last year one of my customers gifted me this for Christmas. It is still one of my favorite things ever.

submitted 68 days ago • 0 comments

The chaos gremlin urge to buy your hateful relative an offensive shirt you know they will love so you can watch them get beat up for wearing it.

submitted 68 days ago • 0 comments

So freakin’ right!

submitted 69 days ago • 0 comments

"If my mouth doesn't say it, my face will," could have been meant for me. Thankfully my kids know how to read my face and cause distractions to get me away from awkward conversations and phone calls.

submitted 70 days ago • 0 comments

If you can't get Fresh Hell, store bought Hell is fine.

submitted 72 days ago • 2 comments

My 7 yo asked what I was doing and I explained I was on a new site. He said, "your face is mad, is it not fun?" Nah kid, it's fine, I'm just old and don't know how to make friends anymore.

submitted 73 days ago • 1 comment

Sometimes I think, "I wasn't that weird as a child," and then I remember that when I was 11 there was six month period when my favorite books were Ivanhoe and Robinson Crusoe.

submitted 73 days ago • 0 comments

One day off is not enough to do all I need to do.

submitted 84 days ago • 0 comments