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esvrld.bsky.social
expert in game theory and international relations. last of the famous international bouncebois. don't blame me, i voted for jo entropic. xe/she fiction: https://wordsmith.social/lightninggarden
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Posts 34 Comments 16

time someone talked about how sexist the 'james bond' franchise is

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

cock ring got stuck and can apparently only be removed in the fires of mount doom

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

not impressed by the dire wolves. i have all sorts of paleogene animals resurrected. i got all sorts of pantodonts, creodonts, shit you can't even name. not letting anyone see them tho because certain people have chosen to be a bitch to me

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VINYL INTO THE SLOT. ITS IMAGINOS AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, DESDINOVA. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SEE VISIONS OF THE FUTURE OR EVEN WHEN I'M LEFT TO DEA

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

many of my posts contain a 'grain of truth'. and asbestos

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

a 'live stream' is when you piss into a powerline

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

whenever a fictional character's crimes are glossed over as 'unspeakable' i like to imagine it was something like putting their dick in a vacuum cleaner

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

(sinking into quicksand) oh come off it. this shit isn't quick at all!

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

as nature is fornication, therefore all representative art is pornography

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

'yea, you better run!' i yell at the windmill's receding arm, unaware the other one is sneaking up behind me

submitted 23 hours ago • 0 comments

World's whitest man found tragically alive

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

i was all for the racism, but by getting in the way of my wife's boyfriend buying me a nintendo switch 2, trump has made an enemy of me!!

submitted 10 days ago • 0 comments

so obviously april 2 is april magician's day, april 3 high priestess's day, and so on. but there are 28 days in april and only 22 cards in the major arcana. so what the fuck

submitted 12 days ago • 1 comment

rather than april "Fools", maybe you should have been focusing on april "Felon", namely, one Donald J Trump,

submitted 12 days ago • 0 comments

oh you sweet summer child, you naive little infant, verily as lacking in understanding as a babe upon its mothers breast: the reason my country has no effective resistance to fascism is that my distance to our capital is 10% greater than that from bona vista to porto alegre :/

submitted 15 days ago • 1 comment

I bought Twitter for $44,000,000,000 and sold it back to myself for $33,000,000,000. I have 43 kids and no friends. Everything I make explodes

submitted 16 days ago • 855 comments

There's a reason we quote this issue more than any other

submitted 60 days ago • 1 comment

yea bluesky no need to tell me what the post was

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

submitted 16 days ago • 0 comments

all terrestrial gnathostomata are invasive species. stay in the ocean bitch

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

coffeeshop au but it's a 16th century ottoman coffeehouse

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

phil greaves blocked me on twitter after i told him hùndùn makes me lactate

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

my kingdom for an asskicking

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

i aim to destroy truth, consume good, and defame reality

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

imagining a caveman complaining about all the woke pronouns

submitted 17 days ago • 0 comments

you know how in Shea/Wilson's Illuminatus trilogy the secret leaders of the world plan a mass human sacrifice to make a bunch of their evil disciples (including Hitler!) immortal? yeah don't know why I've been thinking about that for some reason lol

submitted 18 days ago • 2 comments

I love immigrants. The more illegal the better.

submitted 18 days ago • 5 comments

Hot take, looping in the Atlantic editor makes total sense given that he was in the IDF and the Atlantic is a demented rag by and for public masturbators. He didn't understand the assignment. That's not really on any of the other people in the chat

submitted 20 days ago • 3 comments

Kissinger would have never left his group chat open when planning all those war crimes, smh

submitted 19 days ago • 0 comments

very nearly run over and killed by a frumpy indie babe in a toyota hilux in the parking lot of the ace hardware, narrowly avoiding a fate most of you would pay a thousand dollars or more for

submitted 20 days ago • 47 comments

(being invited to a group chat with marco rubio and jd vance) well well well if it isn't the blowjob brothers

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

(seeing a trump appointee trip over the threshold of a lavatory as he's entering, zipper completely open, step on his dick, and yowl in pain as he starts spraying piss all over himself) wow! project 2025 playbook on full display. we warned you bernie bros about this but y'all didn't listen 💅

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

sir, SIR! have you no decency! decisions to bomb civilian populations should only be planned in face to face meetings with the transcript later shredded!!

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

soo i'm gathering most of you don't bcc a the atlantic writer to all of your communications

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments