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evilalicesg.bsky.social
Tried sitting on the sidelines and became an activist
4,982 posts 693 followers 443 following
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Pretty sure I need to make an appt with Dr. FeelGood

Why is June the only month with a bug named after it?

Watched the PeeWee Herman documentary today. I learned so much!

That’s probably not even a real lady bug, Just an Asian beetle.

I sent you a meme and you laughed in lower case letters… if you’re tired of me just tell me.

These Oreos are my love language

i wasn't sure how many brownies it would take to kill me, but i knew how many i was gonna use

Weird that there's so many other people writing in my online diary.

My daddy issues run deeper than a colonoscopy.

‘i remember when these rides were free’ i say wistfully handing you $8 before straddling your mustache

I refuse to print business cards. I wanna put my number in your phone like you picked me up at a bar.

You can tell who pushes the Qtip all the way through to the other ear with no resistance.

Will my internet still work in a nuclear war

Anyone have a bomb shelter we can hide (make-out) in?

First edible in about a month… either I’ll fall asleep or skeet weird crap

You scream, I scream we all scream for dopamine.

@los-los.bsky.social This is about you!🤣🤣🤣

A stare so vacant that Spirit Halloween takes notice.

Prescription-strength foot rubs

You might feel better if you sat on my face about it.

Assholes sure do hate it when you give back the energy they brought to the table

If you're a true Southerner, you can just make a bunch of incoherent sounds and other Southerners will understand you

I see we are still doing this wake up every day thing.

Screams into your pee hole!

If my skeets get weird just go with it!

Someone said “the world is on fire but you are not the extinguisher. Rest your mind.” And while easier said than done, those words calmed my anxiety a bit.

I can't prove it but I think kids scream so much because they get a split second glimpse of their future

My best skeets come after most folks go to bed. You’re welcome.

Some of us needed a longer childhood and it shows.

plz shut up about cottage cheese ✨

I’d turn my ringer on for you

religion without love is a weapon, maybe the most evil weapon man has ever made