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flag.realhorsepiss.com
don't confuse yourself with nothing
262 posts 21 followers 42 following
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Posts 45 Comments 5

genuinely something wrong with me

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

i keep getting removed from every beach i go to after pulling out my pail that shapes the sand into the twin towers. we've not forgotten that, but free expression is distant memory.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

i think we have to go back in time and give them cans of spray paint. imagine what they could do that we can't even think of now.

submitted 3 days ago • 0 comments

#ThePortsAreOutOfShips Went to the Port of Seattle today. Nothing but cobwebs and Tumbleweeds. Dont walk, RUN to your nearest port and PLEASE start Docking and Unloading.

submitted 7 days ago • 0 comments

weird how people's names don't really line up with what they do these days. you won't see a Carter transporting goods. or a Harper playing the harp. my nonbinary friend Contra: actually i disagree

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

that feeling of old fashioned royalty when they put extra sludge on your burger. like ok wow it's a feast for me tonight! but it's missing intense homoerotic tension with my court jester. and all of a sudden i'm pulled back into reality. and it all feels smaller than it was before

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

i miss you so much

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

WE'RE LANDING WHERE? THE COLD ONE?

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

And then it dawned on me...

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

mining helmet that has a gobo on the light so that it projects the shape of a pelican, but i have ornithophobia so i'm constantly in fight or flight but this is good because my senses are heightened with a steady flow of adrenaline follow for more tips

submitted 13 days ago • 1 comment

I SAW WHAT COMES AFTER THIS LIFE AND IT MAKES ME AFRAID

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

throw pillow? yeah, that's the plan

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

i'm at the factory where they make peeps and they're all transgender. every single one

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

And then it dawned on me...

submitted 13 days ago • 0 comments

every day there's a new machine

submitted 20 days ago • 0 comments

just. my. luck. beer app on my phone actually managed to spill over off the screen. rather miffed

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

oomf in law is burning whale oil because she has no heat 😭😭 girl the tariffs on gristol are 45% 🥀

submitted 26 days ago • 0 comments

i feel. smoother. they're subdividing me.

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

weirdest moment of my life: when i did a handstand for the first time, my muscle memory kicked in as if i had been walking on my hands this whole time. but even more strange, was that my legs could be manipulated like arms. i've never felt more authentic

submitted 114 days ago • 0 comments

standing fan that will occasionally blow out really hot air just to keep you on your toes

submitted 27 days ago • 1 comment

Beauty is in the hive of the bee-holder

submitted 27 days ago • 0 comments

the banks and i got one thing in common

submitted 29 days ago • 0 comments

my poob subscription ran out. can literally anything go right today

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

it is crucial in these trying times that we start putting hazards in the cereal boxes again. sift wheat from chaff

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

call me a fat little piggy the way i can't look up right now

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

that lightbulb moment when you finally get the power back on

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

i'm on fedex.com looking for their customer service number because i just want someone to talk to

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

a lot of ethernet cables are blue because they act like an overshield to guard you from viruses. if you get a red one though it'll make your download speed faster. and if you want the green? oh, buddy

submitted 32 days ago • 0 comments

i'm on internet-81 going 20MB above the speed limit

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

i'm looking for an experimental medical procedure that would turn one of my finger nails into like a tape measure. so that i could pull it out and measure stuff. experienced surgeons hmu

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

referring to the lgbtq community as 'every crook and tranny'

submitted 34 days ago • 0 comments

guy with set of fake teeth but he could only afford the kind that can chew magnets: Hey i'm hungry do you have any magnets

submitted 75 days ago • 0 comments

peak is back #acheswan

submitted 37 days ago • 0 comments

arlefuri😀

submitted 50 days ago • 5 comments

red tinted glasses as my punishment, i can't take them off. they paint my whole world in red. everything feels so aggressive, it's fucking with my threat perception. i thought this 6 year old at the gumball machine wanted to square up. my fight or flight activated.. and my wings are clipped

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

does anyone like woke shit anymore

submitted 61 days ago • 0 comments

music sound so good when the speaker has the mesh grille on it because it's dividing the music into many more smaller musics. you're getting more bang for your buck, very pleasing to the ear

submitted 64 days ago • 1 comment

i need balmora to release a full length album like my life depends on it

submitted 65 days ago • 1 comment

explaining my profession to my friend who fakes being a golfer and he says: ohhhh so it's a lot like a quick play at the 9 holes. umm. first off, no? second off, no one says that

submitted 68 days ago • 0 comments

much like a CRT, i too have a vacuum tube. yeah a tube that vacuums up pasta!! heyoo! let's hear some love for the ethnic girlies of the tri-state #oregano

submitted 74 days ago • 0 comments

i am willing to pay A LOT for someone to exorcise the ghost that's currently haunting my office. he's bending all of my paperclips. and can i be honest with you for a second? it's starting to p m the f o 🙄

submitted 74 days ago • 0 comments

guy with set of fake teeth but he could only afford the kind that can chew magnets: Hey i'm hungry do you have any magnets

submitted 75 days ago • 0 comments

my take is that nothing left to love by counterparts has some of the best guitar leads Maybe Ever and i am very unbiased

submitted 75 days ago • 1 comment

i don't want @morkmorkmorkmork.bsky.social's plane to crash

submitted 75 days ago • 1 comment

i'm dithering images using algorithms they haven't even invented yet. i'm applying concepts i learned from dreams to my work. higher level is an understatement to describe where i'm operating at. purchase my webinar

submitted 75 days ago • 0 comments